“Because she never knows if she’s going to see you and your man accidentally boning again,” Holli quipped.
“Honey, the boning is never accidental,” Mom said, wiggling her eyebrows.
I made an exaggerated gagging noise.
“So, what’s the hubbub, bubs?” Mom asked as Holli and I stripped down to our swimsuits. “Why the sudden visit?”
“Because Holli has news,” I said, nodding toward her.
Holli bounced on the balls of her feet. “I’m gonna be a mommy!”
“No!” Mom’s hands flew to her cheeks. “When?”
“April fourth, if the math is right,” Holli said, practically glowing with happiness.
“So, are you…” Mom asked, gesturing to Holli’s flat stomach.
She shook her head. “No. Deja is doing the heavy lifting. I just supplied the egg.”
“How nice,” Mom said, a little uncertainly, like she was afraid she would say the wrong thing. “It’s nice that you both get to…”
“To be involved in the conception and birth, like parents usually are?” I prodded.
“Yeah. That,” Mom said, a little uncertainly. She was always worried she would offend Holli inadvertently.
“So, what are you hoping for? Boy or girl?” I asked as we put our toes into the water.
“This is the part where I’m supposed to say I just want it to be healthy, right?” Holli asked.
I gave her a look. “I’m being serious.”
“Okay, seriously?” She gnawed her bottom lip. “I don’t know. I don’t know what I want it to be. A girl? Sure, I know a lot about girls. Way more than I know about boys, since I’ve never been one. But since I am a woman, I know what it’s like to be one. And I’m not sure I want my kid to have to deal with that.”
“Fair,” I agreed, sliding into the scalding water with a little hiss at the temperature.
“On the other hand, if I have a boy, I have to teach him not to be the kind of person who treats women the way men generally treat women. How do I do that? And what if it doesn’t take?” Holli asked, a note of panic creeping into her tone.
Luckily, Mom was there to step in and, well, mom. “You’re a good person, Holli. Your kid is going to be a good person because no matter what it is, it will have been raised by parents who care about other people.”
“And you’re not going to know what it is, right away, anyhow,” I pointed out.
“That’s true,” Holli agreed, sinking down beside me. “And that’s why we’re going to let the kid take the lead. We’re going to try to raise it gender-neutral.”
“Gender-neutral?” Mom asked, popping the top off a Smirnoff Ice and stepping in. “How does that work?”
Holli shrugged. “We don’t really know, yet. I guess we’ll know when we start. But we’re not going to do the all pink fancy bows or blue and baseball bats. We’ll probably do a little of both, or none of either.”
“And no gender reveal party?” I asked hopefully. I hated the idea of those. I hated the idea of strangers celebrating somebody’s genitals.
“That is a big, big nope on that one,” Holli confirmed. “But there will be a baby shower. And I expect it to be a blowout.”
Since I was on the receiving end of Holli’s pointed finger, I kind of figured I was the person she held responsible for that. “I’ll draw up a budget.”
“Sophie’s got big news, too,” Holli said, and at my mom’s wide eyes, she added, “Not the same kind.”
“Not the same kind at all,” I emphasized. “I’m quitting the magazine.”
“Oh?” Mom asked, looking between the two of us in shock. “How will that work with Deja being pregnant?”
“I guess that’s another thing we’ll figure out when we get there,” Holli said easily, though I did wonder how she truly felt about the extra workload suddenly thrust upon her pregnant spouse.
Of course, the workload wasn’t really extra since I hadn’t been pulling my weight in the first place.
“I’m giving Deja the magazine. Kind of.” There was no need to go into all of the business side of it with Mom, when I didn’t quite understand all of it, myself. “The lawyers will work it out, but at the end of the day, I walk away jobless by choice, and Deja and Holli own a very successful fashion magazine.”
“Lawyers,” Mom said with such derision that I was surprised she didn’t cross herself and spit. “They’re not going to cause problems between you guys, are they?”
“I hope not. Since I’m not paying them to cause problems.” One thing I’d learned in my leap to the one percent was that lawyers weren’t the evil bad people that pop culture liked to depict.
“I don’t suppose I can count the magazine as your baby gift?” I asked, only to be denied by Holli’s pointed glance.
“Don’t forget the wedding shower,” Mom reminded me. “Just because we haven’t set a date doesn’t mean you have no reason to give me presents.”