Surviving (Surrender 2)
next six weeks, and I know that may mean I no longer have a place. I love you, but you shoved me aside so I did what I needed to do.”
“You are everything to me; nothing is going to change that.”
“Then we’ll see what happens in the next six weeks. I need to go. Please tell Ella happy birthday for me. I assume she’s with you this weekend.”
“Please, don’t hang up.”
“This is killing me, Dec. I wasn’t expecting you to answer, and my heart just broke over again. I’m not strong enough for this.”
“Please don’t hang up on me–I love you so much.”
“I’m not hanging up on you, I’m telling you goodbye. Please be safe and make the best of this opportunity.” I hang up and run to the bathroom to throw up.
When I’m sure I’m done, I wash up and head back to bed. I decide to torture myself and pull up the YouTube videos of all Sayge’s shows the last two weeks. I fall asleep on a wet pillow from all my tears.
*****
Finn wakes me up early by bringing me a cup of coffee and two aspirin. I know he can tell I’ve been crying, but he doesn’t say anything. He tells me to be ready in an hour and dress for day and night. I look at him with suspicious eyes because I was the one who planned this weekend, but he laughs in my face and leaves the room.
We have breakfast in a beautiful café located on Champs-Élysées. I enjoy the opportunity to people watch while Finn reads The New York Times on my iPad. When we’re finished with our meal, I snap a few pictures of nothing in particular.
“Baby Girl, what are you taking pictures of?” Finn asks while I’m adjusting the settings.
“Just making sure my camera’s ready. I have our itinerary in my bag.”
“Trash it.”
“Trash it?”
“Yeah, new plan. I’m taking over today. There may be some things on your list that we hit today, but I’ve got a plan. Some of the places I heard of aren’t on the tourist guide.”
“Finn Black! It states right here on the guide to be safe and stay away from unknown establishments.” I point to the print off in my hand.
“Yes, but Jack’s not only our boss but also a local. He told me some places for us to go, and I trust him. Besides, I have some surprises up my sleeve for you.”
He reaches for my hand and leads me down the street. We walk for a while, and he never lets go of my hand. This is unusual but oddly comforting. The first place we go is the Jardin des Tuileries. I’m in awe of the gorgeous gardens as I look around the breathtaking park. I snap a few pictures and Finn asks several people to take our pictures in front of the most popular statues and fountains. We stop by the kiosks and buy several trinkets. We visit the museums and take turns telling each other what the literature tells us about the paintings and history of the place. After about two hours, we find a place to sit and watch the people pass by.
“Raven, you okay?” Finn asks.
“Yeah, why do you ask?”
“Did you cry last night?”
I sigh. “I did something stupid last night. I talked to Declan.”
“You finally answered his calls?”
“No, I called Ella and he answered. We talked for a few minutes, and I broke down.” I tell him the whole story. Tears fill my eyes, and he scoots over and pulls me close to him.
“RJ, you can’t torture yourself like this. Let’s talk about it. I’ve waited the last two weeks trying to give you the time you needed, but I think you should tell me what’s going on in your head.”
“Can we not do this right now? We are in a beautiful garden surrounded by history. Let’s enjoy our day, please?”
“Okay, I’ll let it go for now, but I need one answer. Are you still engaged?”
“No, it doesn’t appear so.”
*****