Courage (Heroes of Big Sky 1)
“They’re adjusting, too,” Ellie says.
“Sometimes, if Kelsey has had a bad dream and wants to sleep with me, she’ll call me Mama in her sleep.” I swallow hard. “It just about kills me. Because I know she doesn’t even realize she’s doing it. It’s just so sad, you know?”
“Heartbreaking,” Aspen agrees.
“I see the salon sold,” Ellie says. “Have you been in?”
“No.” I shake my head and refill my glass, then open a bag of chips and fetch the guacamole out of Aspen’s fridge. “No, I can’t go in. I haven’t gone since the day I went in to pack up my things.”
“Not even when you sold it?” Alice asks.
“Not even then. But I hear Reagan’s doing a good job with it, and that makes me happy.”
“What are you going to do?” Aspen asks.
“About what?”
“About a job, Tash,” she continues. “Now that things are settling down, and the kids are in school, I’m just wondering what you’ll do next.”
“I feel like I haven’t had the brain space to think about it,” I admit. “And then I hurt my hand, so I definitely couldn’t go back to doing nails for a while. I don’t know if I want to do nails again. It was something I did with Monica, and I don’t think it would be as fun, you know?”
“Maybe a career change?” Alice asks.
“I need to do something. My savings will run out eventually.”
“I’m quite sure there’s a trust for the kids and the person caring for them,” Aspen says with a frown.
“That money is theirs, not mine. It’ll be there for them when they’re adults.”
“It’s there for this very reason,” Alice reminds me. “That in the case of…this, the caretakers can afford to care for the kids.”
“I know, and if worse comes to worst, I’ll use it. But I don’t need it. It’s for Kelsey and Kevin. I’ll figure it out.” I shrug and pop a chip into my mouth. “Enough about me. Let’s talk about you guys.”
“Oh, no,” Ellie says, shaking her head slowly. “You’re going to tell us more about this sexy time with Sam. You’ve had a crush on that man since before I met you, and I need to know every little detail.”
“Yes.” Aspen leans in. “I’m here for this content. Give us deets. Use all the naughty words, and don’t leave anything out. If you forget something, you have to start over again at the beginning.”
“You’re all a bunch of perverts.”
No one responds. They just stare at me, intently. Like I’m about to deliver the secrets of the universe.
“I mean…it was nice.”
“If it was just nice, it was a waste of time,” Aspen says. “But maybe it’s none of our business.”
That’s exactly something that Monica would say.
“You guys.” I sigh and stare dreamily out the window that gives us a killer view of the mountains. “He’s so…sweet. And kind of bossy. And funny. Like the chemistry is ridiculous. And we just fit, you know?”
“Yeah.” Ellie sighs, her face filled with romantic softness. “I do. It’s the best feeling ever.”
“And he’s fun. It’s not all stiff and boring and awkward. He can’t get enough of my body, and I’m not even a little bit self-conscious because he’s so into it. There’s just no room to be unsure.”
“That’s the best,” Aspen says with a nod. “The. Best.”
“And then I asked him if everything would change. Or maybe I said, ‘Does this change everything?’, and he told me to stop overthinking. But then he said that it did change everything, and I don’t really know what that means because all we did was bone for two days, and he’s been fighting a fire and we haven’t talked.”
“Breathe,” Alice advises. “Take a breath.”
“Obviously, when he’s no longer on call, you’ll be able to chat,” Ellie says. “And you’re definitely overthinking this. If the sex was that good and easy, there’s nothing at all to worry about.”
“But, the sex was easy for you and Liam, and you still had doubts,” I remind her.
“Well, yes, because I too am an overthinker.” She laughs and then shrugs. “But it worked out in the end. My advice to you is: don’t make him travel all over the Earth to find you. Just be honest with him.”
“I’ll be honest.” I finish my second margarita. “It would help if I was drunk.”
“No.” Aspen laughs and eats a chip. “No, it wouldn’t.”
Chapter 6
~Sam~
I’ve been tired before. You don’t work the job I do with its demanding hours and the physical demands every day without the exhaustion that comes with it.
But this week has been a bitch and a half.
We lost a large barn and several outbuildings at the Blakely homestead. It was devastating for their farm. And it burned for days. Several of us stayed out there around the clock to ensure the fire didn’t spread underground and head for the main house.