“Sure,” I muttered, fairly sure that the change in direction was an excuse to change the subject as well.
“There’s a five-K race next month,” she said next, confirming my suspicion that she wanted to talk about something else.
Okay, so maybe she’s simply a really private person. Or maybe she thinks I’d be upset if I knew who she’d been dating? The only possible way I’d be upset was if she was dating Ryan, but even though the jealous third grader in me wanted to rear its pigtailed head, I simply couldn’t see the two of them dating. And why would she be encouraging me to make a move on him if that were the case?
Right?
I scowled and slapped my inner third grader down as we finally made the turn to head back to her house. I had enough drama in my life. I didn’t need to fabricate any more.
Chapter 10
I showered and changed into my work clothes at Jill’s house—a far more convenient option than making the thirty-minute drive back to my house to do so, where I would then have to make another thirty-minute drive to get to the station. My cell phone rang as I was toweling off after my shower, but since I recognized Ryan’s ringtone, I finished drying off and getting dressed first. It felt a bit weird to think about talking to him on the phone when I was naked. Yes, I was that stupid.>I sighed. “Bump it up.”
“Ooo, studly!” she grinned as we walked to the road and then started a easy jog, heading toward the lakefront area. “You’ll be running ten-Ks before you know it.”
I scowled. “Y’know, you could at least pretend to have a hard time running.” I could believe she’d been a gymnast. Her uniform hid it, but she wasn’t just slender—she was lean muscle. She ran like a graceful deer, barely breathing hard, while I was already panting by the quarter-mile mark.
“Nah, this is far more fun,” she replied, tone annoyingly chipper. “Hey, you could always go running with Ryan.”
“And have him see my pale flabby legs and my red sweaty face? I think not.”
Her grin turned wicked. “I think he’d love to see you all sweaty.”
“You’re a real pain in the ass, you know? Besides, we’re friends. That’s it.”
“Uh-huh,” she replied, voice thick with disbelief. “You’re telling me that you don’t want to snuggle up with Fed Boy?”
I grimaced. “Things are too messed up right now for that.”
She flicked a glance at me. “Because of Rhyzkahl.”
“I don’t know what to do,” I admitted. “I mean, what the hell is wrong with me? Every time I summon him, we end up fucking like rabbits in heat. And, then I get all confused because I . . . well, I’m starting to really like being around him. I mean, some of the time. Other times he’s totally the powerful arcane dude and I wonder what the hell I’m doing even thinking about getting emotionally involved with a demonic lord. And I like Ryan, but there’s no way that he’s going to make any sort of move on me, or accept any move from me, as long as I’m sworn to the demonic lord.” I had to pant for breath after that long speech.
“Does Ryan know that you’re still sleeping with demon dude?”
I gave a breathless laugh. “Ain’t no sleeping involved, darlin’. But, to answer your question, Ryan knows that I slept with him that first time.” I grimaced, remembering Ryan’s reaction to that revelation. It had been ugly and unpleasant, to put it mildly. Ryan had demanded to know how I could have “fucked that thing.” I’d retorted with something equally heated and nasty. We’d managed to get past the incident for the most part, but it wasn’t an issue I cared to revisit with him. “I figure Ryan assumes that I’m still sleeping with Rhyzkahl, now that I’m sworn to him as his summoner.” I abruptly realized that this was the first time I’d spoken about all of this openly to anyone.
“Seems to me that he’d probably assume you were sleeping with Rhyzkahl even if you weren’t,” Jill pointed out. “So, if you’re gonna be suspected of something, might as well do it!”
“You’re not helping,” I groaned.
She laughed. “I know, but I saw that drawing of Rhyzkahl in that comic. Holy shit, woman. I’d be on him like white on rice!”
I sighed. “Even if I stop screwing Rhyzkahl, it won’t do any good. I think Ryan sees me as tainted goods anyway.” He definitely seemed determined to keep me firmly in the “just friends” category.
Jill grabbed my arm and stopped dead, causing me to flail for balance as she spun me to face her. “Now you listen to me, you stubborn hardheaded bitch,” she snarled. “I don’t know if Ryan sees you that way or not—but if he does then he’s a fucking moron who doesn’t deserve you. And you’d better not see yourself that way, because the only thing you’re tainted with is being a damn human who wants some good fucking every now and then.”
I stared at her for several seconds before I finally recovered enough to give her a weak smile. “Okay.”
She bared her teeth at me in a fierce smile. “I mean, seriously! Why is it that women get so damn angsty about having enjoyable sex?”
“I don’t dislike enjoyable sex!” I protested.
“No? But you’re sure determined to feel guilty about it. So, do you enjoy it?”
I actually blushed. “Well . . . yeah.”
“Does Rhyzkahl make you feel good and sexy and special?”