‘It’s never felt like that, though,’ Chrissie confided, willing to meet his beautiful eyes again, anxiously in search of any sign of revulsion in his gaze and relieved to see only concern etched there. ‘Now tell me something you’re ashamed of...’ she invited to distract him from asking further questions.
Not checking out his father’s story about her once he was fit to do so.
But Jaul didn’t want to rake up that divisive past and instead presented her with another less than stellar moment. ‘I lost my virginity with a very high-class hooker in Dubai,’ he told her grimly. ‘Believe me, I was of an age where it was past time I found out what sex was like.’
‘Why was that?’ she asked curiously.
‘The first real freedom I had ever had was when I went to university in the UK,’ Jaul confided with a grimace. ‘I had no experience whatsoever of normal life.’
Chrissie rested her head down on his shoulder and studied him with drowsy turquoise eyes of sympathy while thinking of how badly she had misunderstood him when she’d first met him and assumed he was the quintessential Arab playboy. In truth he had spent his youthful years of supposed irresponsibility in boarding school and the army with even his free time mapped out by his controlling father. If he had gone a little wild when he’d first slipped that leash, she was sure only a saint could blame him for it.
It dismayed her to appreciate how little they had actually known about each other when they had first married, but it soothed her that she understood him better now and could accept that in possession of his faculties and the true facts he would never have abandoned her.
* * *
Bandar greeted Jaul over his morning coffee by the fire the following morning.
His aide gave him a list of the day’s events and passed on urgent messages before pausing to extend an envelope. ‘This arrived in the diplomatic bag yesterday. It’s from Yusuf and apparently it’s personal and confidential.’ Bandar raised his brows at that surprising label being applied to any item sent by as aloof a personality as his former boss.
Jaul stiffened and lost colour before grasping the envelope. As soon as he was alone, he tore it open. Somewhere in the depths of the tent he could hear Chrissie singing tunelessly in the shower but, for once, he failed to smile. He was reading what his father’s former adviser had to say and in the short note of fervent apology one sentence stood out clearer than any other.
Bearing in mind my actions two years ago, it would have been an offence for me to enter the same room as your queen and offer my best wishes on the occasion of your wedding.
And there it was in a handful of words: what Jaul had most feared. It was confirmation of everything Chrissie had told him because it was obvious that Yusuf had felt too ashamed of his treatment of Chrissie in the past to attend their wedding. That confirmation struck Jaul like a body blow. His stomach lurched and he sprang to his feet, too unsettled to sit still. Evidently, everything Chrissie had told him was the truth. She had been thrown out of his Oxford apartment and humiliated. She had gone to the Marwani Embassy in London to enquire about her missing husband, only for those visits to be mocked and hushed up. She had not accepted money from his father.
Jaul had nourished a secret hope that Chrissie could be exaggerating her experiences after his disappearance, that perhaps what she had endured was not quite as traumatic as she had made it sound, but Yusuf’s reaction to Chrissie’s reappearance in Jaul’s life as his queen was uniquely revealing. Jaul still wanted to hear the details of Yusuf’s dealings with his wife on King Lut’s behalf but he would wait until the older man returned to Marwan to receive them. After all, he already knew the most crucial facts, he reminded himself heavily. His wife had told him how she had suffered and he had doubted her every word, had literally prayed that her lively imagination had encouraged her to embellish her story. And wasn’t this his due reward for his lack of faith in his wife and his all-consuming loyalty to his father’s memory? What had happened to his loyalty to the woman he had married?
Self-evidently, his father had lied to him shamelessly over and over again. Lut clearly hadn’t cared what he’d had to say or do to destroy his son’s marriage. Jaul was appalled that the man he had respected and cared for could have gone to such brutally selfish lengths to deprive his son of the woman he loved.