But Josie stole the show with her clever input and her charm. I was proud to be her husband.
“You know, everyone here is a potential client for you,” I whispered to her while we danced.
“I’m not here for that tonight. I’m here for you.”
She threaded her fingers through my hair, looking at me with happy eyes, as if sensing that I needed all that warmth and sweetness she had to give.
No one had ever cared about what I needed, looked at me as if I was her sole focus, as if nothing else mattered—not the opportunities to strike business contacts or to advance her own career. I almost didn’t dare think it, let alone hope it, but... was it possible I was so important to her?
***
When we arrived home, I was restless. I couldn’t avoid my own thoughts, sinking into that melancholy I did every year on the anniversary.
“Coming to bed?” Josie asked.
“You go ahead. I want to finalize a few emails.”
I was beating around the bush. I doubted I could concentrate on emails. I just didn’t think I could lie next to her and not lay every thought bare. I didn’t want her to see this weak side of me.
“Hunter, you know you can talk to me about anything, right?”
“Go to sleep, babe. We’ll talk tomorrow.”
She fidgeted in her spot, frowning before finally turning away.
I simply couldn’t sit, or even stand still. Forget emails. I headed to the guest room where I kept the treadmill. I quickly discarded my tux, changing into the running gear I kept there, then hopped on the machine.
Our bedroom was on the other side of the house, so it wouldn’t wake up Josie.
I’d intended to only run fast enough to be able to block my thoughts. That usually happened at level ten. It wasn’t enough this time. Memories poked around in my brain, the deep sadness twisting in my chest. I kept increasing the speed and the inclination of the slope, until I had to concentrate on the treadmill only, or I risked falling off.
One foot in front of the other. One in front of the other. Faster. Faster. That was it. The effort drowned out the memories, how much I missed him. How much I hoped he looked down and was proud of everything I’d achieved, of restoring the dream he’d worked on for his entire life.
My lungs were protesting. My chest ached with every breath. The deeper I tried to breathe in, the worse the ache became.
The muscles in my legs started burning. My buttocks were in pain. I glanced at the screen. I’d run for over an hour at this speed? Fuck. I wouldn’t be able to walk tomorrow.
I pressed the End Program button, and the speed decreased gradually. The slower I went, the weaker my thighs felt. I didn’t think I was able to walk right now either.
I nearly twisted an ankle stepping off the treadmill. My legs almost couldn’t sustain my weight. Jesus, what I had been thinking? My throat was as dry as sandpaper. I was completely dehydrated.
A soft whoosh made me look toward the door. Josie was standing there in a white nightgown that barely covered anything, holding a bottle of water.
“Babe... did I make too much noise? I’m sorry.”
“No, I just woke up and you weren’t next to me, and I went looking for you.”
“How long have you been standing here?”
“Forty minutes, give or take. Noticed you didn’t have a bottle of water and brought you one.” She handed me the one she was holding.
“Thanks.”
I guzzled down half the bottle in a few swigs, then tried to gather my thoughts as I put the lid back on.
“I’m worried you’ll dehydrate, or that you’ll get sick. You were going so fast... Hunter, what’s wrong?” she asked softly.
“I’m fine.”