I wanted to usher her into this lifestyle and bring her to heights she’d never experience otherwise. But that couldn’t happen. She was too young and I was in no position to bring her deeper into my darkness.
No matter how much I couldn’t stop kissing her naked skin, I knew I had to leave her to go on about her life.
I scrawled a few lines of a Yeats poem for her. I left it by her pillow and dressed myself, gazing upon her one last time before I took my leave. The lines reminded me of the shadows inside and warned her that she had to stay away at all costs.
No matter what this night had done to her. Or to me.
I gazed upon her innocence one last time, drinking up the warmth that spread within my chest before I left the club. I stayed in the shadows, making my way to my car out back. I had no intention of attempting to top the perfection I’d just experienced and the only thing I wanted to do was head to my penthouse apartment and look down over the lights of the city.
Waves of regret washed over me while the whole of New York City twinkled up at me. I’d taken her virginity, the very innocence of that young, beautiful woman. I’d replaced it with a kink that consumed me. A kink that defined the very man I’d turned into. I’d taken her angelic, songbird rapture and twisted it for my dark pleasures and, by getting wrapped up in the moment, I’d fucked her without a condom.
I’d marked her in the ultimate way and that worried me.
I was clean. I had no worries about that. I got checked out multiple times a year by the best doctors in the country, but I never intended to have sex with her without some sort of protection. I wasn’t concerned about catching anything or giving her anything in return, and the mere fact that I let my guard down enough to forget something that important showed the influence she already had over me.
The influence I never wanted to leave in the first place.
As I stood there looking over the city of New York, I realized I didn’t even know her name. I’d spilled myself into her and pulled orgasms from her body that covered her in a sheen of sweat, and yet I had no idea what to call her.
Nothing other than my songbird.
In the end, it was better this way. I couldn’t see her or talk with her again. I could never reveal myself. With my line of work and the war I’d sunk myself into, there was too much risk for her.
Too much risk to ruin the innocence she still carried with her.
My enemies would love to send a message. Something stronger than just petty acts of vandalism and buying up property. I couldn’t give my enemies anything they could use against me or the family I now headed up since my father’s death. If I took this woman under my wing—if I succumbed to her the way I had tonight—she would be the ultimate bargaining chip. The one thing that made me weak in the eyes of my enemies.
Plus, a woman like her could never love a monster like me; not if she knew the things I’d done in my lifetime. I wanted to remember the look of adoration on her face just before I blindfolded her.
The glass of whisky I was holding in my hand shattered in my grip. I felt like a piece of shit. I ruined the most beautiful thing to ever step foot into my club. I could never see her again, and that was the vow I made to myself that night. I could never see my perfect princess again.
My beautiful little songbird.
I had to focus on my business, on crushing my enemies, and I had to forget about tonight. She was just another woman who satisfied my appetite, and nothing else.
But even I knew that was a lie.
My hand bled as I watched the broken glass fall to the ground. My phone rang in my pocket, and I picked it up without a second thought, feeling the warm blood cascade down my wrist.
Just like her warm, virginal blood had cascaded down my cock only hours before.
“Hello?”
“Hey there, brother. How’d the party go tonight?”
“Lorenzo,” I said. “How are you? How’s that nephew of mine?”
“Oh, you know,” he said. “We named him after me because he causes just as much trouble.”
“Good,” I said. “That’s the only thing nine-year-old boys should be doing. Digging in the dirt and giving their parents heart attacks.”
“It’s all we ever did,” he said, chuckling.
“Yes, yes it was. To what do I owe this phone call?”
“I heard about the troubles surrounding the Del Vecchio family. You good?”