I scooted her off my lap and sat her on the couch. I slid to the floor and got on one knee, then took her hand within mine. Her eyes were watering with tears, and my heart was slamming against my sternum. I could feel my body filling with a state of happiness I hadn’t experienced in years.
“Amanda Scott, you are a wonderful woman. A woman that has brought so much joy and happiness and love into Lanie’s and my life. You are selfless, beautiful, talented, intelligent, and your big heart has somehow found a way to embrace my niece and me. Amanda, will you marry me tomorrow?”
The smile that spread across her face was one that would forever be etched in my memory. She threw her arms around me, her lips colliding into mine. I could feel her smiling and giggling as I laid us down on the floor, the fire barreling heat down onto our bodies as she laid on top of me. I felt full. For the first time in my life, I felt that my life had finally come to a head. I was holding my future in my arms while the rest of my future slept away in her small little bed at the back of the house.
“Yes,” Amanda said. “I will marry you tomorrow.”
“Mommy?”
Amanda and I looked over to the hallway. Lanie was wrapped up in her blanket with tears streaming down her face. She pushed up off my chest and ran to Lanie, scooping her up in her arms as I got myself off the floor.
“Lanie? Sweetheart, what’s wrong?” she asked.
“Nightmare,” Lanie said, sniffling.
“Oh, sweetie. It’s okay. It’s fine. Come here.”
I watched as Amanda scooped Lanie into her arms and carried her down the hallway. But instead of taking Lanie back into her room, she took a right and carried her into mine. I walked in and saw Amanda snuggling with Lanie underneath the covers, and I grinned as I leaned up against the doorway.
“Daddy? Come sleep?” Lanie asked.
Tears welled in my eyes as I heard that name hit my ears.
“Like one big happy family?” Amanda asked.
I was looking at my entire life, encompassed in the bodies of two beautiful girls. I approached the bed and slipped underneath the covers. Amanda cradled Lanie from one side as I cradled her from the other, and the three of us drifted off to sleep that night in one another’s arms. I had dreams of our life together. Of growing old and gray with Amanda as we watched Lanie find her way in life. I had dreams of hikes and arguments and graduations and birthdays. Dreams of lovemaking and vacations and prestigious functions at art galleries around the world. I saw Amanda succeeding and Lanie smiling. I saw Lanie getting her first job and having her first date. I saw Amanda helping Lanie get ready for prom while I talked down the boy standing at the door who was there to pick her up.
I saw the three of us as a family, and I woke up the next morning ready to marry the woman I loved.
CHAPTER 33
Amanda
I woke up the next morning with Lanie still in my arms. Brian wasn’t in bed, but I could tell he hadn’t been gone for long. His side of the bed was warm and crinkled, and I could smell the fragrance of sausage and eggs wafting down the hallway.
I was too excited to eat. Today was the day I was going to get married. I called up Sarah and told her everything that was going on, and she insisted that Brian and I stay away from each other until the courthouse ceremony. I rolled my eyes at her insistence, but Brian figured it would be fun.
So, I kissed Lanie on the cheek and hugged Brian tightly before I ventured back to my cabin.
Walking in hit me with a reality that brought tears to my eyes. My grandmother should’ve been here to see a day like this. The dress and shoes I had picked out earlier in the week for this ceremony were laid across the dusty couch. They were the only thing in the room that seemed to truly be clean, and that thought brought tears to my eyes. My grandmother should be here. She should be the one helping me get ready for something like this.
“Amanda?”
I whipped my head around to see Sarah coming into the cabin. It was the first time she saw it, and I could see the horror on her face. A tear trickled down my cheek as our eyes connected, and she ran to wrap her arms around me.
“Are you okay?” Sarah asked.
“She should be here, you know.”
“She is. She’s here with you in spirit.”
“Is that shit supposed to make me feel better? Because I can’t imagine that it would,” I said.