He tensed beneath those caressing fingers. ‘We are not over, Mariah!’ His arms tightened about her. ‘We will never be over!’
She looked up at him quizzically. ‘What do you mean?’
‘Exactly as I say.’ A nerve pulsed strongly in his clenched jaw. ‘We have begun something this weekend, Mariah. Something good. Something wonderful. And I will not allow you to just calmly walk away from that. To walk away from me!’
Leaving Darian was the last thing that Mariah wanted to do. Indeed, she never wished to be apart from him ever again. Wished to spend her every waking moment with him, and her sleeping ones, too, for the rest of her life.
That was how much she had realised she loved Darian. More than life itself. More than any of the fears of love and intimacy that had plagued her for over half of her lifetime.
She looked up at him shyly beneath the sweep of her lashes. ‘Did I say that I wished to walk away from you?’
‘Well. No. But—’ He looked nonplussed. ‘It will not do, Mariah. I will not have you running all over London and putting yourself in danger as you have been doing these past few years. I will not countenance—’ He broke off as she began to chuckle softly at his bluster, a dark scowl on his brow. ‘I fail to see what is so funny, Mariah.’
‘We are. The two of us.’ She sobered as she saw that Darian was still bursting with anger. ‘We are both so afraid to admit that we might care for or need anyone. In any way. Darian, I will not walk away from you once we are returned to London,’ she assured him seriously. ‘I will be yours for as long as you wish me to be,’ she assured him huskily.
‘You will?’
‘I will,’ she confirmed huskily. ‘Of course there are still many things that need to be discussed between the two of us.’ Her supposed affairs with other men being one of them. Her lack of experience in physical matters being another. ‘But I am sure, once we have done so, that we will be able to come to some sort of arrangement, whereby the two of us—’
‘Arrangement?’ Darian repeated softly, dangerously. ‘I am talking of the two of us marrying, Mariah, not forming an arrangement!’
The shock on Mariah’s face at his pronouncement might have been amusing, if Darian were not so much in earnest. If he did not love this woman more than life itself. If he did not love, admire and respect Mariah more than he had realised it was possible to love, admire and respect any woman.
Except he did. Knew that he felt all of those things for Mariah. So much so that he really had thought his heart had stopped when he looked down at her earlier, covered in blood, and had thought her dead. His own life had ended, too, in those few brief moments. He had ceased to exist. Darian had ceased to live or breathe, in the belief that Mariah Beecham, Countess of Carlisle, and the woman he loved, no longer lived or breathed. All that had remained was a shell, a body, without emotions or feeling.
Until Mariah’s eyes had fluttered open and she had looked up at him and smiled.
It was at that moment that Darian had decided that he was never going to let Mariah out of his sight ever again. Whatever he had to do, however long it took, he intended that Mariah would be his wife, his duchess, and at his side for the rest of their lives.
‘I love you, Mariah,’ he told her now, fiercely, his arms tightening about her. ‘I love you and want to marry you. To spend the rest of my days and nights with you. I love you, Mariah,’ he repeated determinedly. ‘And however long it takes to convince you, I intend having you for my—’
‘Yes.’
‘—wife,’ he concluded purposefully before his gaze sharpened as he realised what Mariah had said, if not why. ‘Yes what?’ he questioned guardedly.
‘Yes, I will marry you, Darian!’ She smiled up at him glowingly, tears now glistening in her eyes. ‘I love you, too, my darling Darian. I love you!’
Darian continued to look down at her searchingly. Hardly daring to believe—to hope that— ‘You love me? How can you possibly love me?’ He frowned darkly. ‘When I have been nothing but judgemental of you from the first. So disapproving. Scornful. Critical—’
‘And kind, caring, protective and passionate,’ Mariah spoke huskily. ‘Would you prefer it if I did not love you, Darian?’ she added teasingly as he still looked down at her in disbelief. ‘I suppose I might try,’ she continued conversationally. ‘But it is so very difficult, when I believe you to be so much all of those things I mentioned in regard to how you are with me. I could try not to love you but— Darian!’ She gave a strangled cry as his mouth finally claimed hers, his arms gathering her in so close against him it felt as if he was trying to make her a part of himself.
And perhaps he was, because for the next several minutes there was nothing else between them but those passionate kisses interspersed with words of love and adoration.
‘I intend that we shall be married as soon as is possible,’ Darian finally warned as he continued to hold Mariah tightly in his arms, as if afraid, if he let her go, she might disappear in a puff of smoke. ‘I believe the least we are owed, for helping to foil this plot against the Prince Regent, is the granting of a Special Licence. Unless, of course, you would prefer to have a big grand wedding, with all of the ton in attendance?’ he added uncertainly as the idea occurred to him that Mariah had never really had a happy wedding day. ‘I suppose I might be persuaded into waiting for a few weeks longer, as long as you will allow me to spend all of my days and nights before the wedding by your side.’
‘A Special Licence sounds perfect,’ Mariah assured him happily. ‘I have already had the big white wedding attended by the ton,’ she dismissed huskily. ‘Neither it, nor that marriage, brought me any happiness.’
‘Apart from Christina.’
She gave a shake of her head. ‘I have always seen Christina as somehow being apart from that marriage. As if she were only ever mine, to love and to cherish. Does that sound ridiculous, in the circumstances?’
Darian’s arms tightened about her. ‘Nothing you say ever sounds ridiculous to me. But I hope— I sincerely hope, would deem it an honour, if you would allow me to become another father to Christina once the two of us are married?’
Mariah’s heart was already full to bursting with the love she felt for Darian, but in that moment she believed it truly overflowed with the emotion. ‘I should like that very much,’ she accepted emotionally. ‘As, I am sure, would Christina. Martin was never a proper father to her anyway.’ She frowned. ‘He took as little interest in her as he did in me.’
‘Carlisle was a fool.’ Darian scowled. ‘But his loss is my gain,’ he dismissed firmly. ‘I assure you that I intend telling and showing both of you, each and every day, how much you are both loved and cherished.’
‘I know you will.’ Mariah smiled up at him gratefully, before biting her bottom lip worriedly. ‘There are still some things we need to discuss, before we make any more of these wonderful plans. Things you need to know about me—’