“Yes.”
I was going to suggest again that Milo flip, but he looked particularly debauched like this, sprawled on his back, eyes hot and needy, mouth slack. I wanted him exactly like this, forever. Slowly, I pushed in, watching his expression to gauge how fast to go. He felt incredible, but even more than that was the way he made me feel. Like I was the one who was the sea god or maybe a rock star. A hero. Someone powerful and adored, and someone who was worthy of sharing this with someone as amazing as Milo.
“Say it again,” I demanded and he nodded, a little smile tugging at his lips even as his body surged with mine.
“I might love you.”
Even the might was endearing, the way Milo qualified it as his eyes still bared his soul. The words spurred me on, and we moved faster and faster together. Our bodies were in perfect sync, like a complex equation with a singular solution, running on an infinite loop. Urgency built and I reached between us, knowing what he needed and loving how his body tensed further, back bowing.
“Jasper.” He said my name like both a question and a prayer.
“Yes.” I would have promised him anything in that instant, and while the power of speech rapidly slipped away, my soul crowed with the words I couldn’t say aloud yet. My body moved like this was a song I’d heard a thousand times, like I knew exactly what to do and when. The physical pleasure wasn’t entirely new, but it was different somehow, tinged with everything I felt for him.
Watching him feel it, too, was a new level of pleasure for me, and I reveled in Milo’s reactions as the silent melody guiding us swelled and peaked. We both went over the edge at almost the same instant, and I was left drained, emotionally as well as physically spent.
“Wow.” He sounded all dreamy and I loved knowing I was the reason why.
But I was also still me, and I needed to hear him say it. “Okay?”
“You need me to write you a sonnet?” He cracked one eye open.
“No. Just be you. And be okay.”
“Always.” He pulled me close enough for a tender kiss, soft and sleepy and everything.
“Always,” I agreed.
I was a smart guy. I knew that always could be a rather finite amount of time. Short. But in that moment, I didn’t want to think about that or any of my worries from earlier. I wanted to pretend that always meant forever and that meant having everything I’d ever wanted, even if it wasn’t going to be easy. And as I rested my head on his chest a few minutes later after we’d cleaned up, snuggling in to drift off, I tried to ignore the way his heartbeat sounded suspiciously like a ticking clock.
Chapter Thirty-Four
Milo
There was a certain weird energy that the world took on after midnight. And I’d seen midnight enough to know, especially lately. Being in the game store this far after closing time was weird, especially as all the other downtown lights flickered off one by one, even the bars hitting closing time. Arthur’s bulk card haul had ended up being boxes and boxes of assorted cards in apparently random order, and we’d spent hours trying to make sense of them, taking over the private game room at the back of the store with our sorting.
“If I see another scroll card, I might scream.” Jasper, who usually was such a fountain of cheerfulness, sounded exhausted, and I rounded the table so I could rub his neck.
“You? Getting frustrated? Never.”
“Hey, you don’t have the market cornered on brooding and bad moods, you know.” He stretched into my touch like a cat demanding more. His funk was far faster to fade than the one I’d been fighting for days now.
“Sorry. I don’t mean to be so down.” I kept rubbing his neck because it felt like the least I could do since he was putting up with me and this seemingly endless quest for the lost cards.
“You’re going through a lot. I get it.” Of course he did because he was like the most understanding person ever, which simply made me feel guiltier.
“I don’t think I could be as nice as you,” I admitted. He was in all respects the better person, and I remained in awe that he’d decided to turn all his wonderfulness in my direction again.
“Many have tried. Few have succeeded.” He gave a regal nod, adopting his Frog Wizard persona for a beat, which earned a laugh from me.
“Goof.”
“You love it.” Moving away from my massage, he preened on his way back to his pile of cards.
“Maybe,” I said cagily. He’d never said it back the night before, so I wasn’t about to make another grand declaration right then while surrounded by piles of cards and Jasper’s boss being in and out of the room. This thing between us was still relatively new. Fragile. I understood why he probably wasn’t ready to say the words, but that didn’t make having been the one to blurt it out easier.