father. I busied myself with my eggs.
Simon raised his eyebrows. "I guess that means no."
I sighed. "I wouldn't say we're close," I said, drawing out my words. "But I love him. He's the only family I have." I didn't add that I had doubts about whether he loved me. I was surprised enough that I had shared with Simon as much as I had.
Simon gazed at me. "It must have been hard to lose your mother so young," he said. "You don't have any other family besides your father?"
I fidgeted with the napkin on my lap. "I don't really remember my mother so I don't really have anyone to miss. I'm not sure if that makes it easier or harder," I admitted. "My mom was an only child and her parents died before I was born. The rest of her extended family is in Korea and I've never had any contact with them."
"What about your dad's family?" Simon asked. He had a way of asking with no pity that made me open up to him. One of the hardest things for me to handle was people feeling sorry for me when they found out my mother had passed away.
"He's pretty much estranged from his family," I explained, stabbing the same bite of food with my fork on the plate over and over again. "He's never talked much about them, or about why he hasn't had any contact with them for years. I figured if they don't want to hear from him, they don't want to hear from me." I shrugged as I finally put the bite of food in my mouth.
Simon continued eating his food, looking at me thoughtfully. "Well, as cliched as it sounds, it's really the people that you choose to surround yourself with that become your family, not just the people who share your blood," he said. "You and Sarah are more like sisters than any real sisters I know. And I know Grant and Marcus would do anything for you. Grant talked about you guys a lot when he would spend his summers at home."
"He did?" I asked nervously. I didn't want to imagine the things Grant had told Simon about me.
Simon laughed. "Relax," he reassured me. "He didn't tell me any of your deep dark secrets. Not that he knows any. He says that you hold things pretty close, not really revealing a lot. Grant said he doesn't know much about you except for what he sees for himself, even though you guys practically lived in each other's apartments last year."
I wrinkled my nose. "That makes me sound weird. I'm really not that interesting." I didn't let myself think about the one secret that I did have. The one that I'm sure everyone would find wildly interesting. The one that would label me as a freak.
"I'll be the judge of that," Simon said grinning.
I laughed, surprised at how relaxed I felt around him. I didn't want to think about how easy it had been to confide in him. Not that I had told him anything that wasn't a normal confidence between friends, but it was way more than I shared with anyone except Sarah.
I looked down at my plate, surprised to see I had completely finished my Eggs Benedict. "I guess I was hungrier than I thought," I said ruefully, indicating my empty plate.
"Good," Simon said. "It makes me happy to feed you."
What the heck do I say to that? I thought.
I gave Simon a small smile. "Don't be too sure about that. I can eat my weight in food."
"Considering you're a lightweight, I'm not too concerned," Simon said, glancing down at my body. I felt myself flush self-consciously. I knew he didn't mean anything offensive by it, but I was acutely aware that I lacked the curves that Samantha and our waitress Crystal displayed.
I arched an eyebrow to mask my discomfort. "Famous last words." I looked at Simon's plates and saw that he had finished everything except his pancakes. "You didn't finish yours. I'm disappointed in you," I joked.
"I've found that I've lost the taste for pancakes unless they're blueberry and served by a specific someone," he said. Before I could reply, he held his hand up to catch the attention of Crystal to get our check.
I swallowed and said nothing, watching Crystal hurry over and lay the check abruptly on our table. As Simon picked up the check, I grabbed a corner of it. "We're splitting it," I said, not wanting to make this seem like a date. I pulled on the bill, craning my neck and trying to see the total amount, but Simon snatched it out of my hands.
"No can do," he said lightly. "My mother would be horrified if she knew I let a girl pay. Anyways, I'm the one that brought you here and you're helping me out by showing me where to go today."
I raised slightly off my seat, reaching for the check futilely as Simon held it under the table. "Simon," I warned. "Seriously, let me pay my half. It's not like you really need my help. It seems like you know how to get around just fine."
"Ah, ah," Simon said, grinning and shaking his finger at me. "Don't throw my chivalry back in my face. It's not ladylike." He pulled out his wallet and pulled out a few bills.
I sat back down and crossed my arms. "Who said I was a lady?" I said grumpily. At Simon's look, I sighed and gave a small laugh of surrender. "Fine. But I'll pay next time."
Simon grinned. "I'm just happy there'll be a next time. Come on." He left the money on the table and slid out of the booth, standing in front of my side and holding out his hand.
I looked up at him and gingerly placed my hand in his. Simon was just being gentlemanly as usual, I told myself. He pulled me up, not stepping back so that I was standing right against him. I held my breath, not daring to look up. The sounds of the restaurant faded away as I was acutely aware of my pounding heart and the warmth of his body. I felt Simon's hand gently tuck my hair behind my ear, grazing his knuckles against my cheek. "Caitlin," he whispered.
I jumped at the sound of his voice and pulled my hand out of his grasp, stepping away. When I finally got some distance between us, I glanced up at him. Simon looked disappointed.
I pasted on a smile, feeling a little sick to my stomach at his expression. Disappointing him hurt a lot more than I thought it would. "Practicing already for the hordes of girls tonight?" I joked lightly.
Simon pressed his lips together with displeasure, so I grabbed his hand, pulling him towards the entrance of the restaurant, trying to ignore how the warmth of his hand made me feel. "Come on," I said, striving to sound upbeat. "Your apartment isn't going to furnish itself."