“I have,” she said. “He’s a close friend and I admire him very much.”
Nathaniel’s expression didn’t change, but his Adam’s apple bobbed and he cleared his throat. “I see.”
She once again toyed with the fabric of her gloves, unsure what else to do with her hands. Quickly focusing on the subject of their conversation, she stared back into the fire. “Henry said it was too dangerous for me to stay despite my protestations. With Father gone and Eliza here—and since our home was destroyed that December… well, my home is here now.”
The scent of smoke wafting from the fireplace in front of her snatched the horrid vision from its hiding place in her mind. Instantly she witnessed anew the roaring flames that devoured her treasured childhood home, taking with it all her cherished memories and replacing them with ash.
She turned to Nathaniel, his face drawn as if he too relived the tragedy. The bond they’d shared that night had forged a friendship that could never be shaken.
Nathaniel stepped forward, the look of tenderness so rich in his eyes it wound around her shoulders like a warm cloak. “I can well understand that, Kitty. Donaldson was right in advising you to return.” Then, as if the heaviness were too much, he shrugged and sighed with added gaiety to his tone. “Well, I will admit that Sandwich didn’t feel the same with you gone, that’s for certain.”
She tipped her head with a smirk. “You pined for my return?”
“With the pains of an anguished soul.”
“Lying is a sin, Nathaniel,” she teased.
Nathaniel laughed, his broad smile exposing his straight teeth. “All right, if you want the truth I pined more for your cooking, and more specifically for your carrot pudding. Are you satisfied?”
“I knew it.” She laughed then sighed as the weight of the evening’s earlier troubles tapped against her memory. “Truth be told, Nathaniel, I’m beginning to believe it might be better to risk returning and staying in Boston rather than making the people of Sandwich uncomfortable with my presence. Tories are not welcome in these circles. I don’t belong here.”
“Don’t speak foolishness, of course you belong.” Nathaniel’s dark brow lowered and his pointed gaze softened. He stepped forward and brushed her elbow with his fingers. “Kitty, you and I were always very good friends. I have never been ignorant of your political leanings. Neither have Thomas and Eliza.” He paused. Strength and caring framed his character
while the fire framed his face. “Nothing will ever change the way we feel about you. Thomas and Eliza will love you without fail—and you and I shall always be friends.”
“I’m sure we shall.” Kitty smiled and tamped her ballooning emotions down with the same force as a fist to a rising lump of dough. Friends. She drew in a long breath. “I wish you to know that even though I believe differently, I won’t go against your cause, despite my reservations about your beliefs.”
“Very generous of you, milady.” Nathaniel’s mouth tilted into a droll grin. “Though I hope you know I won’t stop trying to convert you to our grand cause. That is my mission for every person whom I meet who is not yet a believer in the values of freedom.”
Kitty crossed her arms. “You may try, Nathaniel, but I fear you will not succeed.” She smiled, enjoying the volley of wits. “I shall never abandon the teachings of my father. He was a true, honest man and I know—no matter what Eliza has come to believe—the way he raised us is the right way. I can never leave the safety of the king’s rule, no matter what anyone may say to persuade me otherwise.”
Nathaniel stepped closer and leaned in, the reflection of the fire burning in his gaze. “Now that is a challenge I am most ready to accept.”
Frozen under his hazel stare, Kitty swallowed to try and wet her suddenly dry mouth, but quickly recovered her senses, kindling the ire that sparked at his challenge. “You may look at this as some sort of game, Nathaniel, but I do not.”
His expression crunched and he stepped away. “Game? Not in the least. The cause of freedom is vital. Every colonist is entitled to their liberty and we must have it. This very evening you yourself said we have a right to protect ourselves, a very freedom-loving statement. We need everyone, Kitty. Because freedom is for everyone.”
His words burned. She raised her chin. “So I am merely a possible conquest? A number to add to your forces?”
“When someone as intelligent as yourself is so embroiled in the wrong I find it my duty to enlighten them.”
“Enlighten me?” She scoffed and stiffened her arms at her sides. “Nathaniel, you may think I’m wrong, but I am not.”
“I don’t think you’re wrong, Kitty.” His expression, and his voice, darkened. “I know it.”
The conviction in his eyes sank deep into Kitty’s chest and she recoiled. Nathaniel didn’t remove his gaze and her breathing accelerated. Her jaw flopped open as shock drenched her. He thought she could be converted to his cause. He thought she could be dissuaded from her deep convictions despite their unyielding roots. Did he and Thomas and Eliza really view her as a valued friend, or only pretend it for her sake? The reality of such a thought took the strength from her limbs.
A cutting pain slashed deep. Tears threatened and before the frightful emotions could make themselves visible she darted from the room, but Nathaniel grabbed her arm.
“Where are you going? I came to apologize for earlier and I can’t allow you to leave more upset than before.” The kind sincerity in his eyes wedged the hurt deeper as he continued. “Allow me to speak that which I came to say.”
“Nay. This conversation has ended.” She yanked from his grasp and marched to the door, mumbling under her breath. “Perhaps I should have accepted Higley’s proposal after all.”
“Higley? Who’s Higley?” He marched after her and tugged on her elbow. “You mean Donaldson is not courting you? Has someone proposed to you?”
“Nay, Henry is not courting me, and aye, someone has proposed.” She stopped at the door and whirled around. “I should reprimand myself for not having thought more of the arrangement. At least he accepts me for who I am instead of hoping to change me to meet his expectations.”
She started toward the exit but Nathaniel darted in front of her. “Kitty, you’re talking foolishness. No one wants you to change.”