“I know, but I don’t think you’re ready to hear the answer to your question. And I don’t think Foster is ready for you to hear it either.” He shrugs. “My brother is living in the Land of Denial and unfortunately, my other brothers are letting him.” Sadness momentarily masks his face, but he hastily erases the look, putting on a neutral expression. “But anyway, we’re getting off track.”
Beyond confused, I mentally rewind to what he said before.
Him not having a heartbeat… Him not b
eing alive…
“How are you technically not alive?” I scan him over, his long legs, his lean, tattooed arms, his lavender eyes that seem to sparkle with a hint of hunger all the time. “Because you look alive.”
“In our world nothing is what it appears to be, honey. And the undead usually don’t look the part.” He rests his arm on top of his knee. “In fact, some of the undead are the most beautiful creatures you’ll ever set eyes on.”
I wonder if he’s referring to himself. Not that I’d ever admit this aloud, but Porter is one of the most gorgeous guys I’ve ever seen.
Of course, as Porter struggles not to smile, I become embarrassingly aware that my thoughts may have strayed down the link. Again. Every freakin’ time.
Thankfully, he lets me off the hook and doesn’t remark about it.
“The undead are also some of the most dangerous creatures,” he adds, observing my reaction closely.
I swallow hard, not wanting to say it, but feeling like I have to. “Are you dangerous?”
A ghost of a smile plays at his lips. “What do you think?”
I assess his feelings absorbing into me through the link. Hunger. Desire. Excitement. All of those things are pulsating through him right now and it’s crazy how potently I can feel them. But there’s also hints of agony, sadness, and worry.
“I think you aren’t, at least to me,” I utter, wrapping my arms around myself.
He presses his lips together, the link abruptly purring.
Purring like a cat.
What the shit?
“Nunc potui gravissime vorabit vos,” he murmurs as he reaches out and grazes his thumb along my bottom lip.
I stiffen as a series of emotions scatter through me; guilt, want, fear, need, worry. It’s almost too much to process.
What’s happening to me?
With a sigh, he pulls his hand away.
“You’re right. I’m not dangerous to you,” he says and the link suddenly goes silent. “And me being undead is actually what’s going to help me get you out of here and away from darkness. However, it’s only going to be a temporary solution. In order to rid your body completely of darkness, another measure will have to be taken once we get out of here.” He exhales loudly, a movement I find odd seeing as how he’s supposed to be dead. “Depending on which route we decide to go, it could end up being very drastic.”
I swallow hard. “Just how drastic?”
He gives a half-shrug. “It could be as simple as taking you to a healing doctor.” He gives a short pause as he slants forward. “I’m going to be very real with you right now, but sometimes I think it’s best to be blunt instead of keeping stuff from someone. It’s what makes shit like this happen.” He gestures at the forest and the wisps of darkness dancing in the distance.
Despite my fear of what he’s about to tell me, I give a nod. “I agree with you. No more secrets. I want to know the truth.”
He seems both pleased and worried by my answer as he reaches out and wraps his fingers around my wrist, lining his fingertips to my pulse. What he’s doing is beyond me but it has me feeling all jittery and off balance, like I’m stumbling through a dance I don’t know the steps to, but he knows them perfectly.
“You’re tougher than you look,” he remarks, the corners of his lips quirking. When I narrow my eyes at him, he grins. But all of his humor fizzles as he sighs. “While I wish there was an easier way to permanently erase the darkness currently taking over your body and mind, the only way I can think of right now is to make you the same as me.” He pauses, giving me time for his words to sink in.
“You mean I’ll have to become… undead...” I gulp down a shaky breath. “Does that mean I’d have to die?” I ask.
He gives a wavering nod. “Sort of.”
Blood roars in my eardrums and my heart pounds against my chest. I can barely breathe. Think. Exist. Darkness begins to creep toward me again, feeding off my panic.