She met his gaze again. "I'm here. I just…I sometimes get lost thinking about my past."
"And given how there was angry fire flashing in your eyes, it wasn't about a happy memory, either, was it?"
She should curse Zain's ability to read her so well, but in a way, she liked it. At least for now. "No, it wasn't. But if you can get over what happened to you in the army, then I can focus on the future more instead of the past, and continue to try to make things right."
He leaned forward a fraction, putting their faces about a foot apart. "And just what does this future entail?"
Zain was too close. His heat and scent surrounded her, and combined with the fatherly image she'd conjured up, she wanted to do something ridiculous—lean over and kiss him.
No. Their mating was for convenience, nothing more.
However, she couldn't find it in herself to ignore the dragonman's question. Not after everything he'd shared with her. "I'm still figuring it out. But I'm going to try and be more understanding. I don't know if I can do it all the time, but I want to try to base my feelings, reactions, and responses on the present and what I see instead of what was drummed into me during my time with the Knights."
Zain searched her gaze, his pupils flashing, as he grunted. "From here on out, I'm going to try to do the same when it comes to you."
As they stared into one another's eyes, Ivy's heart rate kicked up, and everything disappeared except for Zain's face.
She was alone with a dragonman, and it didn't bother her at all.
No, instead, it made her want to pull him over and whisper more questions into his ears. Then he'd merely hold her as they talked for hours, exchanging information and learning more about each other.
Could it be possible that this man—no, dragonman—was the one she was supposed to know better than anyone else in the world? Be her partner, and maybe more?
However, Zain cleared his throat, took out his mobile phone as he retreated about a foot, and said, "We should probably go over the questions from my clan members about the data before you get too tired."
And just like that, Zain moved a little further away, and reality rushed back to her.
Unsure of why him moving away should sting, Ivy settled back against her pillows and said, "Then go ahead."
As she answered one question after another, Zain recording them all, Ivy forgot all about her moments of weakness earlier. Maybe with time, she and Zain could be friends. But it was foolish to hope for more.
Chapter Thirteen
As the weeks passed, Zain and Ivy fell into a routine. He'd leave early in the morning to do whatever needed to be done for the Protectors and let her sleep. Around noon, he'd return and eat lunch with her, talking about both the data and the Knights, but also about random things, too.
To be honest, Zain had never talked so much about himself his whole life.
And yet, he now looked forward to his quiet lunches with Ivy. She'd slowly started to do some work with Lucien and Nate in the afternoons, and Zain would help with her physical therapy in the evening.
Ivy would be frail for a while yet, but she had made incredible progress through a combination of dragon's blood injections and physical therapy.
Zain still remembered the first time she'd been able to walk with the use of crutches. Ivy had bitten her lip and moved inch by inch until she'd reached him standing at the other side of the room. Then she looked up at him in triumph, her eyes bright and her cheeks flushed.
He'd nearly lost his self-control in that instant. Never in his life had he wanted so desperately to pull a female close and kiss her.
Yet he'd managed to resist the temptation. Not only was Ivy still weak, the doctors hadn't figured out a complete antidote for her condition.
To kiss or sleep with her could infect him. And neither Sid nor Gregor had any idea how the bloody thing would affect a dragon-shifter.
And that was something Zain needed to remind himself of over and over again. Especially since today was the day Ivy could finally leave the surgery and move into a cottage with him.
His dragon grunted. It's only a matter of time until Sid and Gregor cure her. Then you won't have a flimsy excuse to hide behind.
Ignoring his beast, Zain headed down the hall toward Ivy's hospital room. It'd been bloody hard staying away the whole afternoon to allow the doctors time to do their final examinations and tests, but he'd managed it.
In less than an hour, he finally could take his female home and show her a life outside her hospital room.
Zain nearly missed a step and frowned. Ivy wasn't his female, not really. He'd protect her, of course. That was his duty as her mate, nothing more.