He grinned and winked, which was so Darren. “Then we gotta do this together. I’m not saying it’ll be easy. I’m sure there’ll be days I’ll be a bear to deal with. I’ll be stressed, and you still live across the country, and I don’t know if or where I’ll be playing next season, but we gotta be a team. We gotta be headed for the same end zone.”
Because of course he would use a football metaphor when talking about our future. “We are.”
He leaned down and pressed a quick kiss to my lips before turning to his family. “I want you all to have my back with this—our backs—but if you don’t—”
“If you don’t know your momma better than that by now, I’m gonna kick your ass,” Jada said, and I breathed a sigh of relief. “Let’s figure this shit out. No one threatens my son’s happiness without dealing with me.”
The group of us sat down together and got to work.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Darren
It was confusing as shit to feel so many different things at the same time. I hated that those photos had been released, wanted to be able to figure this out in our own time without being pushed. It was one thing to plan to…come out—it still felt weird thinking of myself having to do that—and another being forced to do it. I’d be lying to myself if I didn’t acknowledge that all the shit we’d talked about over and over, all the concerns, it was all still there, maybe even more so now. The Lightning management and owners weren’t happy about being blindsided, even if the photos were innocent. The question was still out there.
And yet, while I was stressed as fuck, overwhelmed, worried, and a million other things, part of me was relieved too. I didn’t do well with holding stuff in. I never had. I’d always been an open, easygoing guy. I wasn’t sure how well I would have done hiding my relationship with Jeremy. I put myself out there, was blunt and honest, tended to jump before I thought. If I wanted something, I went for it, and despite the odds stacked against us, I wanted Jeremy. None of my fears were stronger than my want for him. So really, I didn’t feel as if I had no choice in doing this. I could lie. There wasn’t proof in the pictures. I just didn’t want to deny it.
That didn’t mean I wasn’t freaking the fuck out as Mia picked me up the next morning for my appointment with Coach and the Lightning management.
“Are you sure you want to do this?” Jeremy asked before I headed out to Mia’s car, where she waited. “We can work it out another way. That doesn’t mean you love me any less. That’s not how this works, Dare.”
I liked that, when he called me Dare. I also liked hearing him talk about me loving him. “I know, but I don’t really work any other way. I can’t ignore this or go out there and lie. I was planning on it anyway. Our timeline just changed from soon to now.”
He sighed, leaned in, and rested his forehead against my pec. “A lot of things are changing for you now, and once you open that box up, you can’t close it again. West lost his family. I know that’s not something you’ll ever have to deal with, but you might lose friends. People will have horrible things to say about you, call you ugly names. It’ll be even worse for you because you’re in the public eye. Because things are better, people think there aren’t still struggles and bigotry, but there are. All you have to do is read the comments on most anything with gay content or someone coming out on social media.”
I frowned, and Jeremy must have realized something was up because he pulled back and looked at me.
“You don’t think I can handle it?” I asked him.
“What? No, it’s not about that. It’s about the world being a shitty place sometimes. And…I love you, so I don’t want you to hurt. I’m scared to death this is going to blow up in our faces and that subconsciously, even though you would never do it on purpose, you’ll resent me for it.”
“No. Will I have bad days? Yes. But so will you. We’ll get on each other’s nerves, and we’ll argue, and sometimes we’ll take shit out on each other. That’s life. It’s like that with any relationship. But when I’m in, I’m in. I don’t run from shit. I don’t back down. I’m not going to let other people’s bigotry ruin my happiness and what I’ve fought for. So…I’m gonna go take care of this shit, and then I’m gonna come home to you. And maybe I’ll get a BJ as a reward for my hard day.”