Mr. Willimaker tried to say that this was not a time for jokes, but everyone was laughing too hard to hear him. His hands sweat even more and blurred the ink so that no one could read it. He was on his own now.
Patches Willimaker walked up to stand beside her father. “Hey!” she yelled. “My dad has something important to say!”
Slowly the noise settled down, and as the eyes of every Brownie in the cave focused on him, Mr. Willimaker was more nervous than ever. With a tremor in his voice, he stated, “Queen Bipsy did many great things for Burrowsville. Except for our troubles with the Goblins, I believe we’ve always been happy here. Her final wish before she died was to know that our next ruler will bring us the same happiness. Maybe more, if he can end the Goblin war.”
A cheer rose in the crowd. Even Fudd cheered, although making the Brownies happy was not in Fudd’s secret plans.
Mr. Willimaker continued, “Before she died, Queen Bipsy gave me the name of our next ruler, a king.”
Fudd sat taller in his chair. This was his big moment.
“However, those of you who only speak Flibberish may have a problem with this name, because the name is not a Flibberish word.”
Fudd shrank in his chair. His name was a Flibberish word, though he didn’t like to remind people of that, since it meant “ugly stink face.”
Mr. Willimaker continued, “Our next king is a human named Elliot Penster.” He paused, waiting for the uproar. At any moment, the Brownies would realize that Queen Bipsy must have made a mistake. Their only action would be to reject Elliot as king and hold an election for their next ruler. Any second now.
There it was! The murmuring began, just as he expected. They were asking each other what the queen might have meant. Maybe she was playing a joke on them and was laughing at them from her grave.
Mr. Willimaker raised a hand, calling for silence. “Now, we all know the queen couldn’t really have wanted a human for our king. Therefore, I propose—”
“But the queen knew how Elliot Penster saved me three years ago,” said Patches to the entire crowd. “That must be why she chose him. He’ll make a great king. I know it!”
Mr. Willimaker stared at his daughter, wondering why he’d ever taught her to speak. She wasn’t helping.
“If he’s brave enough to save Patches from the Goblins, then maybe he can save all of us,” a Brownie in the crowd called out.
“Did I say he’s human?” Mr. Willimaker protested. But nobody seemed to hear him.
“I know he can help us,” Patches said. “Just yesterday he fought another human that looks like a Troll. A bully named Tubs.”
The crowd gasped in shock, although in fact, Brownies think a lot of humans look like Trolls. Patches didn’t mention that Elliot almost lost that fight.
Fudd shot from his chair toward Patches. “You mean to tell me that the next king of the Brownies is a human child?” He turned to Mr. Willimaker. “Are you sure that’s the name the queen said? Are you sure what she said didn’t sound more like Fudd Fartwick?”
Mr. Willimaker coughed nervously. “Er, no, I think I would’ve heard that clearly.” Now that his brain was speaking to him again, he realized what a terrible idea this had been. He wanted to tell the Brownies that he’d chosen the name himself, but it was too late now. Fudd Fartwick would give him hard labor for lying to all the Brownies and would then take over as king. He couldn’t let that happen, even if the lie made his ears turn moldy and sprout grass, which sometimes happens to Brownies who tell lies. He said even more loudly to the crowd, “Elliot Penster is our next king. We must go and tell him the news.”
“Hail King Elliot!” the Brownies cheered. “Long live King Elliot!”
Mr. Willimaker became so excited by their cheers that he began to believe he’d done the right thing after all. What he failed to notice was the one Brownie in the entire cavern who was not cheering.
Fudd Fartwick sat back on his chair and folded his arms. The cheer was wrong. King Elliot would not live long. He might not even live until the end of the week.
He needed the Goblins for this. They’d be happy to help. As much as they liked killing any Brownie, they’d like to kill the human king of the Brownies most of all.
Elliot wasn’t the type to wake up suddenly in the middle of the night, bathed in sweat and afraid for his safety. But his room had never been secretly invaded by creatures from the Underworld before.
“Who’s there?” he called out into the darkness. His brother Reed, who shared his room, would’ve normally answered by tossing a pillow at Elliot and telling him to stop asking strange questions in the middle of the night. But Reed was working at the Quack Shack late tonight. And it wasn’t a strange question.
“Are you Elliot Penster?” The voice was higher in pitch than he was used to, as if someone had sucked helium from a balloon before speaking.
“That’s me. Who are you?” Elliot switched on the light beside his bed and then jumped back. Two small things were on his floor staring up at him, a younger girl and a boy thing that might have been her dad, if things had fathers. They were dressed like something out of a fairy tale book and stared at him with wide, hopeful eyes. He didn’t think they were trying to be scary, but the fact that they were standing in his room was scary enough.
The boy thing stepped forward. He was dressed in a little suit, and his hair stood out in fewer directions than the girl’s. A large pair of glasses slid up and down his nose with the movement of his head. He pushed the glasses up and said, “We’re Brownies. Not like the dessert that you eat, but Brownies, the creatures that we hope you don’t eat.”
Elliot shook his head. “The only brownies I’ve ever eaten don’t talk to me.”
Mr. Willimaker smiled at that as the girl nudged him and whispered, “See? I told you he wouldn’t eat us.”