Chapter 23
BERNARDO AND OLAF both moved away a little, as if the emotion were too much for them, or they were leaving the hysterical woman to Edward. There was more than one reason he was the unofficial leader. When you do the hard things, you get to call the shots.
He looked at me for a moment, then asked, "Are you all right?"
It was such a weird thing to ask that I wasn't angry, just puzzled. "What the hell does that mean?"
"It means what I said. You seem on edge."
"Oh, I don't know, I've got a serial killer mailing me body parts. I had Lieutenant Grimes actually ask me if I was Jean-Claude's human servant. My blood test alone should have gotten my badge yanked, but no one's come to talk to me about it. I've been living with Jean-Claude and the guys at the Circus for months, and I miss my house. I miss my stuff. I miss being alone with Nathaniel and Micah. I miss being alone with anybody. There are too many damn men in my life, and I don't know what to do about it."
"You don't want dating advice from me, Anita."
That made me smile, in spite of myself. "I guess not."
"But you aren't the only preternatural branch marshal who's been attacked on the job. I think unless you actually shift and they could prove you a danger in court, they aren't going to bitch. I think they're afraid of getting sued, workman's comp or something like that. They certainly don't want the first of us in court fighting to keep their badge to be you."
"Why not?" I asked.
"You're a woman. You're pretty. You're petite. You'd look like the poster child for being picked on by the big bad government."
I frowned at him. "I'm no one's victim, Edward."
"I know that, and you know that, but the media won't know that."
"So you're saying that if I were a man, they'd have asked for my badge by now?"
"Not necessarily, but being a girl helps you here; don't begrudge that."
I shook my head. "Fine, fine, whatever, fuck it. Do you really think that SWAT will insist on coming with us?"
"If we're serving an active warrant, yes."
"Well, then a trip to the tigers is almost useless. I can't talk freely enough in front of them."
"We can see the priestess first, but you're not going to avoid Grimes and his men."
"Damn it."
"Most of the time it's nice to have that much extra firepower and technology behind us. Just for you, me, Otto, we can do and say things on our own that we don't want SWAT to see or hear. You for all the secrets, and us for practical solutions."
"I'm pretty practical myself, Edward."
"Ted, Anita; you need to work on that and use the right name."
"Fine, Ted, I do my share of practical solutions." I took a deep breath in and blew it out, slowly. "We can see the priestess while we're waiting for the warrants. It'll give me the illusion we're doing something useful."
Bernardo and Olaf had sidled back over. The fact that I hadn't realized they were within hearing distance said I was a lot more distracted than was good for my job.
"You sound bummed, babe, did your undead boyfriend not come through for you?" Bernardo said.
"Do not call me babe, or any other term of endearment, okay?"
Bernardo spread his hands, as if to say, Fine.
"Did your vampire lover disappoint you?" Olaf asked, and whereas it had been pure teasing with Bernardo, Olaf made it sound way too serious.
"My relationship with Jean-Claude is none of your business."
He just looked at me, and even through sunglasses I could feel his stare, heavy and uncomfortable.
"What?" I demanded.
Edward stepped between us, literally blocking my view of the other man. "Drop it, Anita. We'll go see Sherman's priestess; by then the warrants will be up. We'll deal with our police escort when the time comes."
I realized that Edward probably needed to know some of the potential problems with the weretigers. But I didn't owe the other two men the explanation. "We need to talk, Edward," I said.
"Talk," he said.
"In private."
"You just had a private discussion," Bernardo said.
"No, I got upset, and both of you bailed on the hysterical woman, and left Ed... Ted to deal with me. Now I need to tell him things that really are private."
"We are your backup; don't we need to know what's going on?" Bernardo said.
"I'll tell... Ted, and then if he thinks you need to know, I'll tell you."
They didn't like it, but when they got to sit in the car with the air-conditioning, Bernardo liked it better. Olaf went because he had no choice, but he didn't like it.
When we were alone in the pounding, bright heat of the Vegas desert, I told Edward. I told him about Max and his queen wanting me to sleep with their tigers. I told him about accidentally giving powers to Crispin.
Edward took off his hat, wiped the area of the sweat band, and settled the hat back on his head. "You do have the most interesting problems."
"Is that a complaint?"
"Just an observation."
"You know everything I know now; do we need to tell the other two?"
"Some of it."
"I'll let you tell as much, or as little, as you think we need."
"What if I tell them all of it?"
"If you think that's best; I trust your judgment."
He nodded, and started for the car. "Let's get out of the heat, and I'll tell them something while we go see a witch."
"She's a Wiccan high priestess; not all Wiccans like to be called witches."
"I'll remember that."
"You already know that," I said.
He smiled at me. "You know, if we really were sleeping together, Olaf would back off."
I gave him the look the comment deserved. "You aren't serious?"
"About doing it for real, no. Donna would never forgive either of us, and it would destroy Peter. Besides, it would just be..." He made a waffling motion with his hand. "Wrong."
"Like doing family," I said.
He nodded. "Something like that. It's not what we are to each other."
"So what do you suggest?"
"How close are you to this tiger Crispin?"
"Biblical," I said.
He smiled and shook his head. "Is he dominant or weak?"
"Weak."
"That won't make Olaf back off. It's got to be someone that Olaf can respect."
"Can't help you there. Wait, he knows I'm doing Jean-Claude and Micah and Nathaniel. Are you saying none of them measure up to his standards, but you would?"
"He doesn't respect any man he thinks might be gay, Anita."
"Yeah, Otto is an all-around prejudiced bastard. But they're all doing me, regardless of who else they're doing; that makes them like girls?"
"Otto is like a lot of people; bisexual is still gay, if you're doing guy-on-guy." He grinned suddenly, and it was pure Ted Forrester. "Of course, girl-on-girl is just one guy away from a fantasy."
"Please, don't tell me you think that's true?"
His grin softened around the edges, and the real Edward leaked into his face, even around the sunglasses. "I have to be Ted while we're here, Anita. We've got too many cops around to be myself." The grin came back, wide and good ol' boy. "And Ted thinks that lesbian means you just haven't met the right man."
"I'd like to introduce Ted to my friend Sylvie and her partner. Trust me, neither one of them thinks they need a man in their life, not in any way."
"We good ol' boys need our illusions, Anita." We were almost to the car.
I spoke low. "You're about as much a good ol' boy as I am... Ted."
"I'll have to be Ted if SWAT is with us, Anita."
I stared at him. "Shit."
He nodded. "You aren't the only one who has to be careful with an audience."
"When having police around makes you have to lie all the time, Edward, maybe we aren't the good guys?"
He opened the passenger door for me, which he never did. I let him, for Olaf's sake, but it bugged me. Edward leaned close and whispered in my ear so that Olaf would think he was whispering sweet nothings, but what he actually said, was, "We aren't the good guys, Anita. We're the necessary guys."
I settled into the seat, with Olaf and Bernardo wondering what Edward had said to me. I couldn't make my face match his smiling one. I couldn't play along that he'd whispered something naughty in my ear. I could only sit and let my sunglasses hide my eyes and help me lie to the people who were supposed to be helping me.
I was lying to the police, lying to my backup; the only person I wasn't lying to was Edward. Funny how that was usually the case when we worked together. He explained that the weretigers' queen might try to fix me up with some of her people in a bid to bind themselves closer to Jean-Claude's power base. True, as far as it went. I just stared ahead and kept the glasses on.
Edward turned in his seat so he could see both men better. He started by explaining to all of us. "I arranged for the warrant to be dropped off here, at the coroner's parking lot. We can chat while we wait."
"Chat?" Olaf said, suspicion plain in his voice.
Then Edward started in with no preamble, just straight to the point. "Anita has a lover among the weretigers. He'll probably be friendly to her, so let him."
"How friendly?" Bernardo asked.
I laughed, I couldn't help it. "Let's just say that Crispin is a little... eager."
"How eager?" Olaf asked, and he didn't sound happy at all.
I turned in the seat so I could see them both. "You guys know I need to feed the ardeur; well, Crispin will probably be my food either tonight or tomorrow morning."
"Feed, how?" Olaf asked.
"Sex, Olaf, I'll feed during sex."
"So the rumors are true-you really are a succubus, then?" Bernardo said.
"Yeah, I guess I am."
"You don't have to go to the monsters to feed," Olaf said.
"I've fed on Crispin before, so he knows what to expect."
"I would be happy to help," Bernardo said.
"No," Olaf said, "if she feeds on any of us, it will be me."
I shook my head. "I know your idea of sex, Olaf; I don't think I'd survive long enough to feed."
"For you, I would try."
I stared at his sunglass-covered eyes with my own. I tried to see past that impassive face. I understood that he had offered me sex, just sex, not violence, and that for him, that was almost unheard of. It was a positive step for Olaf, but I so did not want to be that step.
I looked at Edward for some help.
"You'd really just have sex with Anita, not tie her up or cut her up?"
Olaf nodded. "I would try."
Edward licked his lips, a sign of nervousness, though in this heat, maybe not. "I didn't think you thought of sex without the violence."
"For her, I would try," he repeated.
"Edward," I said, "help me out here."
"It's a big step for him, Anita. You have no idea how big."
"I have some idea, but..."
Edward lowered his glasses enough to give me his eyes, and those eyes told me something. They told me to be careful and not blow this. It took me a second, then I realized he was right. It was a hell of a lot better that Olaf wanted "normal" sex than to go all serial killer on my ass. It was a lesser evil, so I tried to say something that wouldn't crush his attempt at being better.
"I don't know what to say to that Olaf. I'm... flattered and entirely creeped all at the same time." Mostly, in truth, I was just freaked, but I didn't want him to think that I rejected his idea that sex could be about something other than death. I mean, maybe if he thought that about me, he might find someone else whom he could actually have a relationshp with. Too weird, too entirely weird, that Olaf might be salvageable. But who the hell would I trust in his bed? Who the hell would I risk, on the chance that he might not go apeshit on her? There were no good answers here, just strange ones. I had that feeling of falling down the rabbit hole, except there'd never been serial killers in Alice in Wonderland, though I guess you could make a case for the Queen of Hearts. Off with their heads!