Fourteen
The next morning, Gaby and her children arrived at the castle and at last Liana had someone to talk to. And best of all, Gaby told Liana of the disagreement Rogan and Severn had had over Baudoin.
“But my husband defended me?” Liana said softly.
“Oh yes, my lady. He told Lord Severn to keep his mouth shut, and Lord Severn has done everything he can to make my Baudoin quit and return to the village. But my Baudoin will never quit.”
“No,” Liana said with resignation. “Peregrines don’t ever seem to quit or back down or even relent.”
“That’s not so, my lady,” Gaby said. “Lord Rogan has changed since you arrived. Yesterday you walked across the bridge and Lord Rogan stopped yelling at one of his knights and watched you.”
“Did he?” Those were sweet words to Liana. “And he does defend me to his brother?”
“Oh yes, my lady.”
Liana couldn’t seem to get enough from Gaby. At times it seemed she’d had no influence on Rogan, that he was the same man who couldn’t remember her name. But he remembered it now. Just this morning he had held her in his arms and kissed her and whispered her name in her ear.
Three weeks after Baudoin and Gaby’s arrival, Rogan and Severn were still at such odds that they were barely speaking. Liana tried to get Rogan to talk to her about his anger, but he would not. Yet in bed he clung to her. Sometimes she felt as if he wanted her to make up for all the softness he’d lacked as a child.
In the evenings after supper, sometimes he came to the solar with her and sat sprawled on a cushioned chair and listened to one of her ladies play a lute and sing. She’d started to teach him to play chess, and when he realized it was a game of strategy, rather like war, he quickly became quite good. Zared began to join them, and Liana was pleased to see the young man sitting cross-legged on the floor holding a skein of yarn for one of the women to wind. One evening Rogan had been lounging on the window seat, Zared seated on the floor nearby, and Liana had seen Rogan reach out his hand and caress Zared’s head. The boy had smiled up at Rogan with a look of such love and trust and adoration that Liana felt her knees weaken.
With each day Liana felt her love for her husband grow deeper and stronger. She had se
nsed from the beginning that there was more to him than what people saw, that there was a softer side.
Not that the softer side was easy to see. They’d had a couple of arguments that nearly brought the roof down on their heads. Rogan refused to believe Liana was good for anything but bed pleasure and providing him with food and drink. And no matter how many times she showed him otherwise, he never even remembered, much less learned anything from what she’d done.
Even though she’d passed his test and he even joked with her about it, in the end she had to fight him to allow her to help judge the local disputes. She pointed out how she had delivered the thieves to him, but it made no difference. He had decided she couldn’t judge the cases, and no amount of reason or logic was going to dissuade him.
She finally broke down in tears. Rogan was not a man who fell apart at the sight of a woman’s tears, but what he hated was her lack of smiles. He seemed to think it was her duty to always be happy and cheerful. After a day and a half of Liana’s misery, he relented and said she could sit beside him in the court cases. She had thrown her arms about his neck and kissed him—and then she’d tickled his ribs.
Severn had walked into the Lord’s Chamber and seen the two of them rolling about on the floor, Liana’s headdress knocked off, her hair cascading about her as she tickled his big brother into helpless laughter. Severn’s rage had sobered them immediately.
Severn, Liana thought. She was still amazed that her brother-in-law could cause her so much unhappiness. When she’d first arrived, he’d seemed to be on her side, but as Rogan had changed, so had Severn. Now, it was almost as if he hated her, and he did everything he could to turn Rogan against her. Not that Rogan even mentioned what was going on to Liana. No, she had to rely on Gaby for that information. On the training field Severn taunted his brother, ridiculed him for being led by a woman.
The more Liana heard about what Severn was doing, the more comfort she tried to provide Rogan. In the evenings she sometimes saw how torn he was, as if he warred inside himself whether he should give in to the pleasures of her solar or stay alone in his brooding chamber.
His brooding chamber caused their second big fight. After he’d spent two nights alone in there, Liana went inside. She didn’t knock or ask permission for entry, she just walked in, her heart pounding in her ears. He’d yelled at her. He’d blustered and fumed, but there was something in his eyes that told her he didn’t actually mind her invasion.
“What are those?” she’d asked, pointing to the stack of papers on the table.
He’d argued some more, but at last he’d shown her his sketches. Liana didn’t know much about war machines, but she knew something about farm machinery and this wasn’t all that different. She’d made a few suggestions and they had been good ones.
It had been a lovely evening, just the two of them together in that little room, bent over the papers. Several times Rogan had said, “Like this?” or, “Is this better?” or, “Yes, I think that might work.”
As he often did, Severn had ruined the evening. He’d pushed open the half-open door, then stood gaping at the two of them. “I heard she was in here,” he’d said softly, “but I didn’t believe it. This room was sacred to our brother Rowland and to our father. But now you let a woman in here. And for what?” He nodded toward the sketches on the table. “To tell you how to build war machines? Is there nothing of the man left in you?”
Liana was pleased to see that when Severn stomped away, he was scratching his arm furiously. She knew that once again lice were infesting his clothes and she hoped they ate him alive. She turned to her husband. “Rogan…” she began.
But he was already on his feet. He left her alone in the room and as far as she knew, he had not visited the room since.
Her heart went out to Rogan as she saw him fight within himself. Part of him wanted the softness and tenderness she offered, but part of him wanted to please his angry brother. He trained and worked many hours during the day, trying to be the leader of the Peregrines, to prove to his men and especially to his brother that he was still worthy of his position as their master. And in the evening he never fully relaxed during the pleasures Liana offered.
She tried her best to keep her rage at Severn under control, but it was difficult. She wrote a letter to her stepmother, asking Helen if she knew of any young heiresses Severn might marry. If she could find a wife for Severn, perhaps he’d leave Rogan to her.
It was the third fight that turned the tables and made Rogan side with Severn against her.
Liana was boiling with rage when she stormed down the stairs into the Lord’s Chamber. Severn and Rogan were sitting at the table, calmly eating breakfast but not speaking to each other.