Sometimes I couldn’t believe he was mine. Well…secretly mine. I’d find myself staring at him from across the locker room, lost in a state of admiration and longing. Occasionally he’d catch my eye, and I swore it took everything I had to stay focused and pretend he was just one of the guys. Not easy when my mind conjured visions of him on his knees while he sucked my cock.
We figured it would seem more natural if we were politely indifferent in front of our teammates in the beginning. After a while, they’d assume we’d put our differences aside and become buddies. By the end of September, we decided we’d passed the “friendship” test and gave ourselves permission to spend as much time together as we wanted.
We were inseparable. We shared meals in between practices. We took turns walking each other to class, and then we’d text afterward and agree on a location to meet before heading off to a second practice together. Gabe would come over after the final game or practice of the day, I’d make us something to eat or he’d grab something on the way back to my place, and we’d curl up on the sofa and watch television with our feet tangled under the coffee table.
On nights I was sure Evan would be out late, we were braver. We’d lie in each other’s arms, pausing the action on the screen to grope and make out until the desire to be naked became too strong to ignore. Then we’d head to my room, lock the door, shed our clothes, and come together in a passionate frenzy. And every time seemed better than the last.
I couldn’t believe what I’d been missing. I loved the feel of his stiff cock against mine. I loved touching him, holding him, and within a few short weeks, I’d become obsessed with learning how to give a decent blowjob. My Google search engine was an embarrassing treasure trove of “how-to” tips about pleasing your man. The perfectionist in me demanded that I be as informed as possible. Some of the online articles I read were helpful reminders to relax your jaw, mind your teeth, and one said humming while bobbing your head was a good thing. I shifted in my seat uncomfortably. Jesus, I couldn’t even sit in class without thinking about sex. I cast my gaze from the white screen at the front of the lecture hall to the penis doodle in the corner of my open notepad.
Oops. I flipped the page over quickly and gave a sideways glance at the student next to me, who thankfully seemed engrossed in the professor’s spiel about the future of global economics. I started to turn when I noticed a familiar face a few seats away. I craned my neck and—what the hell?
Amanda.
I’d seen her at a few parties and around campus, but we hadn’t talked since Chelsea’s fateful end-of-summer bash back in August. What the hell was she doing in this class? Sure, there were more than three hundred students here, but I couldn’t believe I hadn’t noticed her. Even if she’d transferred, I should have seen her by now. I wondered why she hadn’t said hello. Maybe she’d decided the “ex-to-friends” thing wasn’t going to work. Not something I could worry about. I was here to learn, I reminded myself as I reopened my notebook to the penis doodle page. I flipped to a clean page just as my cell vibrated in my pocket.
How’s class?
I stared at Gabe’s text for a few seconds, then glanced up at the professor briefly before replying.
Boring. Why aren’t you in biology?
I am. It’s mega boring. Like watching paint dry.
Mine is too except I just noticed Amanda is in this class too. And she’s sitting five seats away from me. I didn’t notice her until today.
Gabe sent a series of surprised-faced emojis. Do you think she’s following you?
Doubtful
Just don’t flirt with her.
I sent him a smiley face emoji. Don’t worry.
Gabe responded with a flurry of hieroglyphic emojis that would probably take the rest of class to unravel. Then he followed it up with a single heart and, See you at practice, Ebab.
I frowned at the screen. What’s ebab?
Babe backward. I’m just trying it out. What do you think?
Weird. I like it.
I like you.
My pulse skittered. They weren’t those three words, but they still seemed significant. I held my finger over my keyboard and wracked my brain for a non-threatening way to say, “I’m so fucking obsessed with you in a not-creepy way.” I typed and erased “me too,” “same here,” and even a lame-ass “cool” before repeating his sentiment.
I like you too. And then I added, Ebab
I pushed Send and held my breath. Then I turned off my cell and stuffed it in my backpack.
Geez, what was happening to me? I’d never been this tangled up inside over a girl. I wanted to be near him all the time. He was commanding yet approachable. I’d never met anyone as passionate as him. He truly had a lust for life. Gabe wasn’t capable of casual interest. If he liked something or someone, he gave his all. To be the someone he thought of outside of the pool was…electrifying. He sparked something in me I’d never felt before.