Starting from Scratch (Starting from 2)

“But what if he’s dying, Ky? He has no power over you. It doesn’t matter if he praises you or rips you apart anyway. You know you’re good. You know you’re talented and smart and worthy. You don’t need his opinion or—”

“No, I don’t.” Ky shifted on the bench and thumped his fist against his chest twice then grunted. “You want a real opinion you can trust, you get it here.”

I jolted. Thank God we were sitting. I’d heard that line before. The first time I saw the man with the baseball cap at a Zero show. “Where’d that come from? Who said that?”

“My dad. He had dozens of so-called helpful one-liners. He’s like a mad pirate who throws his first mate overboard, then tosses him a rope, but won’t pull him in. I’ve learned a couple of invaluable lessons from him. One…never commit if you can’t follow through. And two…never have kids.”

My head was reeling as my brain worked frantically to put the pieces together. And when I did, it was verbal vomit at its worst.

“Your dad comes to your shows,” I blurted. “I think your dad is Nelson. He’s the critic who said Zero sucks, but he comes back every time. He was there last night.”

“What? What are you talking about?”

“The critic,” I repeated, jumping to my feet. “The guy who hates Zero. Nelson Cormer.”

“My dad’s name isn’t Nelson.”

“Is it Ed?”

Ky’s forehead creased. “Yeah, but I probably told you that or—”

“No. You’ve never told me his name, and I didn’t ask because I know there’s bad blood. But why would he come to your shows?” I paced a few feet away, then turned back to him. “He never says anything nice but…”

“Well, that part sounds about right,” Ky huffed, pulling my wrist in a wordless request for me to sit beside him. “But he’s not a writer.”

“He is. And he’s not bad, which isn’t great for us. He writes crappy things about you guys, and he goes out of his way to mention Declan. Do you think your dad helped get him signed at Sandstone? Is he friends with those guys?”

Ky didn’t speak for a long moment. “I don’t know.”

“I understand family issues like no one’s business, but I don’t see why he’d actively work against you. You need to talk to him and find out what he’s up to and—”

“No.” He turned to face me and shook his head vehemently. “I’m not going to.”

“Then I will.”

“No, you won’t.”

“Yes, I will,” I repeated. “I want an explanation. He can’t get away with this. He’s fuckin’ with your band and messing with your head, and if you’re not going to stick up for yourself and find out why, then I will!”

Ky took his sunglasses off and fixed me with a stern look. “Take a seat, hothead. This isn’t your battle. You don’t even know if it’s the same person.”

“Okay. I’ll ask.” I changed my tone to something less combative, then added, “Assuming I’m right…why would he do it? Or maybe I should ask if your dad is the type of guy who’d blatantly try to sabotage your career.”

“Yeah, it’s definitely something he’d do. He was one of those ‘Do as I say, not as I do’ parents. He didn’t like being disobeyed. And had poetic ways to ‘teach me a lesson.’ When my mom told him I entered a local skateboard competition, he said it was a waste of time and told me to drop out and study. I did it anyway and I won. Instead of congratulating me, he dismantled my board and left the pieces on the front porch. When I was a senior in high school, I had a crush on a guy. It wasn’t my first time, but it was the first time I wanted to do anything about it. My mom was going through treatment and she was in a bad place. My sister had moved back in to help take care of her. It was an ugly time for sure, but my dad was nowhere around. They were divorced, I get it. He had a new wife and Mona had money and older kids and…they were probably everything he hoped Karly and I would have been. So, I really didn’t think he gave a shit what I did or didn’t do anymore. So I asked this guy out. I think his name was Ryan—”

“Such a pretentious name,” I said sarcastically.

Ky chuckled, then cupped my neck and drew me close to press a kiss on my lips. “I love it when you get jealous. It’s cute. You want to hear this or not?”

“I don’t know. I’m afraid I’m going to get really mad.”

“Maybe, but it was a long time ago.” He tugged one of my curls playfully. “Ryan and I went out a couple of times. He wasn’t the love of my life.”