“I dug through your kitchen and managed to come up with something we could use. Drink up. It should help relax you.”
She took a sip. The dark liquid burned a path down her chest yet centered her somehow. She crossed the room and stared out the window to the street below. Carly tried to hold on to her anger at Mike. She had to. Without it, she didn’t have anyone to turn the brunt of her feelings upon. So he had been torn between her and his brother. His brother, his only family, or a woman he’d just met. Not much of a decision there, she thought bitterly.
He walked toward her and placed a hand on her arm. “Do you understand what I’m saying?” His intense gaze bore into hers, causing a pulse-pounding heaviness in her chest.
Afraid she understood him too well, Carly backed off, heading for the center of the room, searching for space.
SIX
Mike watched Carly’s retreat. Somehow she seemed too composed for a woman who had not only broken her engagement but just discovered that her fiancé had been cheating on her as well. She set down her drink on the hardwood floor and turned her attention to a white wicker basket overflowing with magazines. She crouched down, knees resting on two over-sized throw pillows fringed in yellow.
As he watched, she began rummaging through the stack of magazines, tossing unwanted ones to the side. A huge pile formed beside her. Whether her task enabled her to ignore him or whether she was searching for something, he couldn’t say. The relevance of her actions escaped him, but she seemed to need the distraction.
Her movements caused her robe to part, revealing a hint of cleavage and the round swell of one breast. Mike sucked in a deep breath but found it impossible to look away. He shifted positions and lowered himself onto the couch because if she looked up now, she’d run far and fast. The sweats she had lent him were too tight under ordinary circumstances. What he felt now went way beyond ordinary.
He glanced at her again. “What are you...”
“Aha. Found it.” She rose, then ripped a page from the chosen magazine. “Did you know there’s such a thing as wedding insurance? Damage control for a wedding canceled due to unforeseeable events. Let’s see.” She skimmed the article in her hand.
Mike narrowed his eyes and focused on her distracted behavior. He realized now that she was more affected than he’d originally thought. He fought the urge to ease her pain. To wrap her in his arms and never let go.
Just because she’d dumped his brother didn’t make her ready for another relationship. Especially a short-term affair with a man who, as she’d so rightly said, was unable to commit. Whose career was destined to take him farther away at any time.
She’d had enough pain. He had no desire to add to it.
She raised her gaze from the magazine page. “Too bad,” she murmured. “Weddings canceled because the bride wore blinders while the groom was a cheating son of a bitch aren’t covered.” Her voice broke over her words. As she lowered her arm to her side, the page drifted to the floor.
“Carly...” Mike stood.
“It’ll cost every penny I have in savings and then some to cover the expense of ending this charade.”
“Peter will pay his share,” Mike muttered. He’d see to it. “Better now than after the ceremony.”
She attempted to laugh but choked on a sob instead. She dropped to her knees and bowed her head. Her damp hair fell forward, obscuring her face from view. Without warning, her shoulders began to shake violently.
Something inside him shattered at the sight. Not since his parents’ deaths had he allowed another person to get close. As tight as they were, not even his brother had breached the wall around his heart. Carly tapped into emotions he’d never experienced before, ones he didn’t understand now. She’d reached the part of him that he’d protected for the better part of his life. Watching her, he had the unsettling notion that nothing would ever be the same again.
Mike crossed the room and crouched down beside her. He lifted his hand and then let it drop uselessly to his side. Never having received a warm or loving embrace as a child, he wasn’t sure how to comfort her now. He only knew he had to try.
He wrapped his arms around her. Her body molded to his. She rocked back and forth in his embrace as he held on tight. The fragrant smell of her shampoo drifted around him, tickling his nose, tempting his restraint.
As need surfaced, comfort became a hazy notion. He coaxed her back until they lay side by side against the pillows on the floor. Mike cradled her head, running his fingers through her silken hair. Gradually her trembling subsided, but she didn’t push him away. They lay together in silence. Her rapid breathing slowed. As she unconsciously matched her breaths to his, a feeling of contentment stole over him. It was as if he’d been running away and had finally found what he’d been searching for.
“Want to talk about it?”
“No.” The muffled sound was almost lost. With one hand, he brushed the tangled hair off her face.
“I’m sure it hurts to be betrayed by someone you love.”
She shook her head. “I wasn’t.”
Wasn’t what? he wondered. Betrayed? Because if Peter had done nothing else, he had betrayed both her trust and her innocence. Mike hoped he hadn’t destroyed them as well.
She drew an unsteady breath. A glassy sheen coated her eyes and her dark lashes were fringed with moisture. “I wasn’t betrayed by someone I loved,” she said, lowering her gaze. “I compromised until there was almost nothing left of me. In being so accepting, I gave him the freedom to cheat on me.” She sighed. “In a way, I deserve some of what I got.”
“How the hell can you think that?”
“I didn’t say I deserved all of it, but there’s no escaping the fact that I used him, too.” Looking down, she stared at her hands. “I never loved Peter.”