He hangs his head.
“Oliver.”
He looks at me. His gaze is steely. “You said you were sick.”
“You know I’m not sick.”
“I know. But you said you were, and I’m taking you at your word.”
“So you sent soup and meds?”
He grins. “Yes. Because if you’re sick, that’s what you need.” His smile falters. “Shaye, I’m sorry.”
“What are you sorry for?”
He pulls his hand away from mine. I miss it immediately.
“I’m sorry for not listening to you. For not giving you the benefit of the doubt. For being so scared that I ran with my tail tucked between my legs.” He sighs and sits back. “I know who you are. I hate myself for questioning your loyalty to me.”
The pain on his face is evident. I know he means what he’s saying. But that doesn’t solve everything.
I grab Nate’s water bottle and take a long drink, praying he doesn’t have any diseases.
“Tell me why you paid off Luca’s debt,” I say.
He presses his lips together. His chest rises and falls.
“Oliver?”
He looks at me. “When you told me that Luca had left you with such a large loan and you didn’t know why and that he had used your mother’s house as collateral, something didn’t add up. It felt wrong. So I had some people look into it.”
I don’t know where he’s going with this, but I know I don’t like it.
“I have their report if you want to read it. But Luca was not a good guy, Shaye. He was into some bad stuff. He owed people money—dangerous people who I would imagine could find themselves in federal prison if they were ever picked up by law enforcement.”
My jaw hits the table.
What the actual fuck?
“Am I safe?” I ask, looking around as if someone might be looking through my windows. “I didn’t have anything to do with whatever he was doing. Do they know that? Do I need to … Shit. I …”
“Breathe.”
My attention whips to him, and I do—I breathe.
Just looking at Oliver makes me settle. It makes me feel safe. And the fact that I don’t have that luxury anymore makes the tears well up in my eyes again.
He takes my hand.
“There are rumors that Luca’s accident wasn’t an accident. That someone put a hit out on him,” Oliver says. “I’ve heard the coroner was paid off to say he was asleep at the wheel, but from what I’ve read, that’s probably not how things went down.”
A chill rips through me.
“The company you were paying off is … they’re legit by a thin definition of the word. They are not anyone you want to be involved with, and when I realized that’s who you were paying …” He wipes a tear off my cheek with his thumb. “I love you. The thought of someone coming after you over a debt that wasn’t yours to begin with. I couldn’t live with myself, Shaye.”
What the hell? Who the hell was Luca dealing with? And possible murder?
I cannot process this. I can’t.
“But why didn’t you tell me?” I ask through my tears. “Why didn’t you …? Why didn’t you say something?”
“It’s not an easy conversation to start, Shaye.”
My mind sorts through all of my memories with Luca and tries to find any tip-off that this was happening.
“I’ve had a lot on my plate. My parents were getting divorced, and now my dad is in rehab …” He shrugs. “There’s been a lot of shit. I kept thinking I’d find time to tell you, but they notified you much quicker than I expected. Probably from the strong language my attorney used when sending the payment.”
“I’m sorry you had to go through all of this. I really am.”
He brushes a strand of hair out of my face. “I’m sorry that I didn’t meet you sooner so I could have loved you longer. It would’ve saved us both a headache.”
I smile at him. “Thank you for doing this. But I will still pay you back.”
He shakes his head.
“I’m not asking you,” I say.
“I’m not taking your fucking money.”
“Yes, you fucking are.”
He glares at me.
I slip my hand out of his and stand. There has to be a way to make him understand.
Walking to the window, I gaze out at the street.
“I know I told you that we were over, but we aren’t,” he says.
“Not sure I remember agreeing to that.” Even though I want to. “We seem to have a very different view of how things work between us.”
“Is this about the money?”
I turn and look at him. “Yes. Partly. It’s also about all that honesty you talk about. This is quite an omission, and I do believe that, according to you, omissions are lies.”
He looks at the table.
“I didn’t want Marius Blast any more than you wanted to hurt me by getting the information about Luca. We were both doing our best under difficult circumstances, Oliver.”