Carter nods, running his thumb over his freshly shaven chin, the stubble already starting to show. He’s a beast of a man, dressed up in a tailored suit.
“My only thought, and something I hope you would consider… if we get rid of Walsh, who will get rid of Marcus?” Carter questions and for a moment, Jase’s head tilts as he considers his brother.
I’m nodding my head in short, nearly undetectable movements when Carter looks at me. I’ve found companionship with Jase, and friendship with Declan. Carter though has never allowed a step toward anything other than a working relationship. He’s guarded, and until recently, I’d hardly spoken to him in the years I’ve worked for the Cross brothers. He’d be in the room, he’d speak. But not to me. Never to anyone other than his brothers. Guarded is a word that doesn’t do him justice.
The trust simply isn’t there. I respect that. I understand it more than he knows.
“You certain there’s nothing you’d like to tell me?” Carter questions. “To tell us?”
A prickle of unease travels along my skin. Hot and sickening, but I answer calmly and with a no-nonsense tone. “Not a damn thing. If there’s something you’d like to ask, I’ll do as I’ve always done. I’ll tell you whatever you want to know.”
Declan and Jase are quiet as Carter squares his shoulders and contemplates a moment. “Something’s going on with you,” Carter finally speaks.
My palms are clammy as I clench and unclench my fists. “If you’re doubting—”
“You are in this family. I don’t doubt your loyalty or your ability… yet.” Although Carter’s tone is harsh, there’s a softness I haven’t seen from him before. You are in this family.
I am in no family. I haven’t been for quite some time.
“Like I said, there’s something going on with you.” As Carter repeats the accusation, Jase leans back against his desk. The skin on his knuckles turns white as he grips the edge of it.
“Old ghosts,” Carter surmises. “For weeks now.”
Ever since I saw Laura with Bethany, Jase’s girlfriend. I only nod, swallowing thickly.
“If something’s going on—”
“It’s personal,” I reassure him and keep my tone even but without any room for discussion. “It won’t get in the way of anything.”
“If I’ve noticed the change, Seth… those ghosts are already in the way.”
Laura
I’m trying to remember everything Seth said two weeks ago, but all I can hear is Babygirl. All I can feel is the prick at the back of my eyes. He asked me how I thought it would end… that’s right. That aching feeling in my chest returns and I swallow, dry and harsh as I sit in my car. My seatbelt’s off and the constant pinging from the dash is driving me crazy until I pull the keys out of the ignition.
I begged for his forgiveness while all he did was stare at me through the rearview mirror. I tried to explain, but his gaze remained brutal and unforgiving. I put my hand on his shoulder once, and that was the only time he really looked at me. First my hand, and then into my eyes.
He wrote down an address, this address. In the note, he told me to come in two weeks—which has felt like forever. And he gave me a time… five minutes from now.
Don’t make me come for you.
I read the line noting how quickly my heart beats, then the pause and the sudden shortness of breath. A wave of overwhelming emotions crashed down around me. The thought of him coming for me will always make me feel conflicted. I want to run from him, but I also want him to capture me, to force me to stay. Because I’m selfish, just like my heart is when it ticks and skips like it’s running and it’s out of breath.
I stopped taking my medication for arrhythmia when I got settled here. My hand instinctively hovers over my chest as the thump, thump, thump goes off beat. With my eyes closed, I breathe in deep and tell it to calm down.
I haven’t needed a pill in years. Seth King fucks up my heart. No one can tell me otherwise. It’s all his fault.
Ping.
Jolting from the buzz on my lap, as I sit in the car outside of the address Seth gave me, I silently scold myself. Calm the fuck down.
The heat from the vents hits my face and I’m quick to flick the button off. It’s cold for an autumn night, colder than it’s been since March if I remember right, and the wind is unforgiving too.
With the blush of the sunset on the horizon, I’m close to a moment I knew would come one day. For better or for worse. I’m safe in my car… safe for now.
It took me twenty-five minutes to drive here. All in silence. That’s all it took. It felt like forever, but forever is over far too quickly now that I’m sitting here staring at the massive house. It’s all old light gray stone with dark blue roofing… the slabs all the way up there look like stone too. It’s hard to tell this late at night though. There are two stories with a wraparound porch. There isn’t a piece of furniture at all outside though. The old Victorian has been cared for. It’s obviously been meticulously maintained, which must take effort given that it’s out here, surrounded by miles and miles of woods.