Jackson still didn’t stop and he focused his attention back on me fully. I gripped the counter, my elbows weak. I sensed Oliver move, I thought leaving us alone, but a moment later I felt him. He eased behind me, cradling my body against his chest, snaking an arm around my thigh, opening me for Jackson.
I sighed and relaxed into him, feeling stabilized and incredibly, overwhelmingly aroused.
Jackson continued his movements, continued his kisses. Oliver’s mouth moved to my neck, sucking gently. His hands traveled to my breasts; cupping, kneading, twisting. I slid my hand over his shoulder and into his hair, linking our bodies together.
The moment was extreme, full-bodied, mind-melting. I writhed against Oliver. I bucked into Jackson’s hand. I breathed into his mouth. When my second orgasm of the day came rushing over me I was surrounded by heat, by heartbeats, by warmth. I was surrounded by two men that’d stuck by me, that despite the rocky past two years, loved me, and I didn’t hold back. I let Oliver support me. I rode Jackson’s hand until I slowed, easing into blissfulness. And when I finished, finally finished, bleary-eyed and breathing heavy, they wrapped their arms around me and we hugged, the three of us, forging a different kind of bond.
36
Heaven
The dress had a dusty rose tint, the bodice shimmery with sequins and beads; the skirt made of n
etting that grazed my knees. I felt like a ballerina, but Amber looked like a queen. Her dress was ivory, straight and strapless. We’d both tried on our dresses and it was now my turn to stand on the pedestal, twisting to look at the back—it plunged in a deep v, revealing my slim back and the tattoo nestled at the bottom of my spine.
Five stars, inked like a constellation.
I’d gotten it just after the breakup, panicked and consumed with sadness. After years of not wanting to hurt myself I felt the need for something real—pain. Something to remind me I was still alive, even if they were gone. I didn’t pick up the blade. I walked into the tattoo parlor and had the artist ink a star for each of us on my back. Even if they were no longer there, I still carried them with me.
Amber smiled when she looked at me, pleased at her choice. She wanted a fairytale-beach wedding and a dress like this for her maid of honor was just one step in that direction.
“God, it’s gorgeous, you’re gorgeous,” she declared.
“It’s an amazing dress. Are you sure it’s not too much? I don’t want to upstage you,” I joked. I ran my hands down the netting, feeling the rough material. I liked this dress too. A lot.
I noticed a button needed fastening on Amber’s dress and stepped down. “Turn around,” I told her. As I slipped the button in the hole, I broached the question that had been circling in my brain all day. “Have you ever had a threesome?”
She glanced over her shoulder. “You’re asking me that? You’re the one that had four boyfriends at the same time.”
My cheeks warmed. “I know, but I’ve told you before, we weren’t really into that kind of thing.”
I smoothed the back of her dress with my knuckles and she turned around. “Yeah, I have actually. With Ginger and Ben, back when he and I were trying out the open relationship thing. A few times, actually.”
“Really?” I was a little shocked. “He was into that?”
“Oh yeah. Two girls at once? He was definitely into it.”
“How was it? You know, overall?”
“It was sexy, but I may have been a little spoiled. Both of them were into me and I think I reaped the benefits.” She lifted the hem of her dress and walked closer to the mirror. I made eye contact with her reflection. “Is there a reason you’re asking?”
Amber wasn’t stupid, and she’d expressed her confusion and surprise that we hadn’t explored this side of our relationship before. I decided to just admit it. “The other day after Oliver and I had some amazing make-up sex, Jackson and I were kissing in the kitchen. Then Oliver came in and instead of leaving or us stopping or whatever we would have done before, he kind of, uh,” I felt my cheeks burning hot, “he joined in.”
Amber’s jaw dropped. “Wait, wait, there is so much to unpack here. You and Oliver had make-up sex? Like you made up? And Jackson, too? And then right there in the kitchen?”
I nodded. “It was unbelievably hot. I mean, I’d fantasized about it some, but the guys seemed more comfortable keeping things separate.”
“They baby you, you know.”
“I know.” Even though I’d tried desperately to get them to stop, they couldn’t help it.
“Do you think you’ll do it again? What’s the next step? Do Hayden and Anderson know?” The questions came out in a rush.
“Yeah, I think it’s likely we’ll do it again. I hope so, you know? And I’m not sure on the next step, other than Jackson, Oliver, and I know we’re not done with one another.” She eyed me, waiting for the final answer. “Hayden knows a little but he’s in a relationship with Sabine. Anderson? We’ve texted a few times, but he’s isolated himself so badly now that no one even knows what’s up with him.”
“Wow,” she said. “That is a lot. But you know what’s crazy?”
“In my life? God knows, you tell me. What’s crazy?”