Just as I slip my fingers to the end of the towel that’s wrapped around my body, ready to strip it off, the door opens and I nearly have a heart attack. I grip the towel tighter as the door opens and then closes just as quickly, leaving Lydia standing in the room with a huge ass grin on her prettied-up face.
How the hell does she always look so bright eyed and happy? She barely sleeps, yet there’s not even a trace of bags under her eyes. And with her hair pulled back in a tight ponytail, she looks peppy and ready to take on the world.
“That was a-fucking-mazing,” she says with enthusiasm that forces a smile to my lips.
I’m still taking it all in, but I smile back and tell her, “Thanks.” I chew on my lip wanting to say more, but I can’t think of what to tell her. It feels like I’m holding everything back. I suppose I am, but for good reason.
Lydia doesn’t seem to notice. If she does, she doesn’t let on.
She grabs a bottle from the fridge and sits on the far side of the bed and lets her heels rest on the edge, wrapping her arms around her knees. “Julie quit,” Lydia says quietly and then takes a swig from the bottle of water. “Did you hear?” she asks me.
A grimace hovers on my lips as I pick up the lotion from the vanity. My skin’s still damp from the shower. “About Julie?” I ask her and pop the bottle open. The soft smell of lavender floats toward me as I let a line of lotion trail down my right leg and then rub it in.
“Yeah, I heard,” I tell her and then swallow the lump in my throat. Julie didn’t have the nicest things to say about me. But I have to keep in mind that she doesn’t know me and she’s obviously upset. I had to tell myself that over and over in the shower.
If she hates me, it’s not because of me, really. It’s just the situation.
“Don’t worry, she’s gonna get over it,” Lydia says between sips of water and then tightens her ponytail.
I massage the lotion into my other leg as I think about how Julie had to be told that a nobody was taking her part. If I was her, I’d be pissed.
“I think she started the rumor about you and Nate anyway.”
It’s weird that everyone calls him Nate. My nose scrunches at the thought of calling him that.
“Did she really?” I ask her and she shrugs. My brow’s pinched at the thought of Julie starting rumors. But then again, I don’t know her either.
“Probably,” she answers and then tosses the empty bottle into the small bin right next to the fridge. “She saw the way he looked at you,” she adds as she opens the fridge for another. “You want a drink?” she asks me, looking over her shoulder.
I shake my head no. A frown forces its way onto my face until my lips are puckered, while I rub the remainder of the lotion into my hands and ignore the fact that Julie may have started a rumor that Nathan and I used to date. It’s true, so it doesn’t matter much really.
“You didn’t tell anyone, did you?” I ask Lydia as the thought occurs to me. Her brow furrows as she shakes her head. Her long black hair sways back and forth with the forceful motion. “Not a soul,” she answers.
My clothes are on the seat of the chair. Just a pair of black leggings and a baggy t-shirt with, “Coffee first!” printed on the front in a swirly font. Lydia takes the hint before I even have to tell her and she falls onto the small bed and stares at the ceiling as I get dressed.
“So, are you two,” Lydia hesitates to finish, but she does, “like, back together?”
It’s quiet for a moment as I take in the knowledge that rumors are going around, and to be very honest with myself, I don’t even know what to make of Nathan and me. I’m drowning in my emotions and waiting for him to make the next move. Maybe that’s a mistake.
“I don’t know what we are,” I tell her as I bend over and towel dry my hair before wrapping it up and sitting it on my head. The large motions cue her to look back at me and she cracks up laughing.
“You look too ridiculous with that thing on your head to be talking like that.” I can’t find it in me to laugh with her. I want to. I don’t want to feel this anxiety and uncertainty. I’ve only ever had that in my life with Nathan. Only him.
“Seriously, it can’t be that bad,” Lydia says as she appears to tune into my mood. “You guys got into a fight and broke up on bad terms.”