Whispered Prayers of a Girl

I look deep into his eyes and know he means it.

“I love you, Gwendolyn, and it scares me so fucking much that I almost didn’t get a chance to tell you. I never want to go a day without saying those words to you.”

Tears threaten again, but I don’t want them to ruin our moment. With my hands still on his cheeks, I pull him down for another kiss.

Against his lips, I tell him what I’ve felt for weeks now.

“I love you too, Alexander. And I want to hear them from you just as much as I want to repeat them back. Every day, forever.”

He closes his eyes again, like he’s simply soaking up my words. The look that comes over his face can’t be mistaken for anything other than pure love.

The dull ache in my head starts to pound harder, and I can’t help the wince that slips free. I don’t want him to know I’m in pain, especially right now after confessing our love. I want to bask in it for a while longer before reality sets in.

I’m out of luck though, because Alexander pulls back, but grabs my hand.

“You need to rest,” he says, kissing the back of my hand.

I shake my head and immediately regret it. I take a deep breath, hoping to alleviate the pain.

“I don’t want to rest. I want to stay awake and see you and the kids.” I smile. “And hear Kelsey talk again.”

He smiles back at me. “We’ll be here when you wake again. And I’m sure Kelsey will be talking your head off in no time.”

“I’ll never get tired of hearing her speak,” I refute his claim.

He nods in understanding. “You still need to rest. You hit your head pretty hard and needed stitches. The sooner you get better, then sooner you can come home.” He gives me a stern look. “But in order to do that, you need rest.”

I can’t help the smile that’s trying to slip out. Despite the dire situation we were just in, I’m happy. More happy than I have been in years. Both of my kids are safe, my beautiful daughter is talking again, and I think on the mend, and I have Alexander. There’s nothing more I could ask for.

Alexander chuckles, and the sound sends pleasure coursing through me. My head may be pounding at the moment and my body may feel like I’ve been hit by a Mack truck, but my heart feels so light and carefree and full.

He kisses me again, and this time, he lingers a bit longer, but doesn’t make it too intimate.

“Lie back, baby,” he says gently after pulling back.

I do as he says, and as soon as my head hits the pillow, my eyes become heavy. The pounding in my head lessens fractionally when I close my eyes. I feel a light kiss on my forehead, and my lips tip up into a smile.

I feel such a huge relief now that I know everything will be okay. There’s still a small part of my heart that hurts knowing that Will’s no longer around to see his kids flourish and grow, but I know he’s watching us with a smile. He knows the man taking his place will love and protect us just as fiercely as he ever would. And I like to believe that Clara and Rayne are sitting beside him with the same smile and knowledge that the kids and I will do the same for Alexander.

“I love you.” I feel the warmth of the whispered words against my cheek.

“I love you,” I whisper back, then let my mind drift off to the stunning vision of the future. One filled with lots of laughter and love. A love so strong that nothing could ever take it away or break it.

Epilogue

Alexander

Two and a half years later…

I pull the rag from my back pocket and wipe the sweat from my forehead, then take a minute to look around and admire my surroundings. It’s done. It’s finally fucking done. The excitement and anticipation of seeing the pleasure on Gwen’s and the kids’ faces once I show them brings a smile to my face.

As soon as I step out onto the porch, I hear girly giggles and boyish laughter. I chuckle when I see Daniel chasing after Kelsey with a water gun. Gigi, Pepper, and Charlie run after them. Every few steps he gives it a few pumps, then pulls the trigger, hitting her in the back.

It took a while for Kelsey to fully get past her mutism and start talking regularly. She still went through phases where she wouldn’t speak for a few days, but the time between those episodes grew until they no longer existed.

Two days after Gwen was released from the hospital after the accident, she made an appointment for Kelsey with a psychiatrist Jeremy recommended. Kelsey went once a week, a

nd even Gwen and Daniel went to a few sessions with her. When Gwen told the doctor about what happened to Clara and Rayne, she asked if I would consider coming in for private sessions. I didn’t really care to open myself up to a complete stranger, but I did it for Gwen and the kids. Surprisingly, it did help. Pain still grips me at times, but I’m able to manage it better.