Patty laughed. “Who doesn’t have the hots for him?”
“Kynslee, apparently,” Heather said with a smug grin.
I shot her a dirty look, then followed the girl over to the table to dry my nails. When I sat down in the chair, I tried to push away all the confusing thoughts. Miles had been back for over two weeks. He had settled right back into his life on his family’s farm just like he’d never left, or at least that’s what I heard my mom saying to my dad. It felt like everywhere I turned, there he was. I couldn’t get away from him. I knew it was a small town, but it wasn’t that small.
I’d run into Jen, Miles’ momma, a couple of times. She had been over-the-moon happy because Miles was home. I did wonder if Miles has told her he asked to cash in on that stupid promise and she realized she’d raised a jackass of a son. If she did, she never said a word during our conversations.
I sighed and glanced out the window to the creek behind the spa. Each time I conveniently ran into Miles, my body reacted. He affected me in some way every time, but then again, he always had.
Shit. Shit. Shit.
The man was driving me insane.
I closed my eyes to keep the tears back. If he truly wanted to marry me, why now? Why wait and try to make me agree to a stupid promise we made so many years ago? Why not come back, ask me on a date, and do it the normal way? The whole thing seemed off. Yes, we made each other a promise all those years ago. Yes, I knew deep in my heart I couldn’t marry Jack because I had given my heart to Miles, and yes, I was falling back in love with the jackass each time I saw him.
But why not come back to town and simply ask me out? Or hell, even ask me to dinner as a friend, like he’d done with Becky?
“Penny for your thoughts,” Heather said, sitting next to me.
Focusing on her, I asked in a low voice so Patty couldn’t hear us, “Why do you think Miles asked me to marry him? It can’t simply be because we made a promise twelve years ago.”
She dug her teeth into her lip and took in a slow, deep breath before letting it out.
“Why not?”
I stared at her. “Why not admit to me how he truly feels? Why come back and do it this way, try and force my hand? If he simply asked me out on a date, I’d go. He must have truly lost his marbles on those missions.”
She nodded. “Okay, I’ll admit that is the part that is throwing me. He loves you, Kynslee, but I’ll be honest with you, I think there is a reason behind his approach. It might not be as sinister as you suspect. Maybe he simply doesn’t know how to ask you out. I mean, if you think about your relationship, y’all were more like fuck buddies and less like boyfriend-girlfriend material.”
“We’ve had sex three times, Heather. Classifying us as fuck buddies requires that we be on the same continent…hell, in the same zip code for more than twenty-four hours every couple of years.”
“Think about it. Each of those times were profound. You lost your virginity. You slept together before he went into the Marines, then he came home on leave, admitted a possible future, and woke up the next morning and decided to be a douche. There had to be a reason for his doing that.”
“I think so, too. There has to be something else.”
She nodded. “You haven’t seen him in so long, and I don’t doubt he loves you. You’re the only other person he has kept in touch with besides his family. To me, that screams the guy cares about you.”
“Yeah,” I whispered as I looked back out over the creek.
“May I ask you something, Kyns?”
“Of course,” I stated with a forced smile.
“Do you love him? And by love him, I mean, have you waited all this time for him? Is Miles the reason you told Jack no?”
My lips pressed into a tight line, and I tried to keep my chin from trembling. I couldn’t look her in the eyes because she’d see the truth in my very soul. I had tried so hard to not think about my reasons for telling Jack no. We had fun together. The sex was good, not anything like when I was with Miles, but it was good. I cared about him, probably loved him enough to marry him. But when reality hit, I couldn’t make myself say yes.
Heather took my hand and gave it a slight squeeze. “I thought so. I think it’s time you paid a visit to Miles. Y’all need a come-to-Jesus moment, sweetie.”