“No. I’m terrified. What if I’m pregnant? Then what?”
“Then you ask yourself what you want.”
“To turn back time and to have never met Todd.”
“Can’t go back. We can only move forward. It’s going to be fine.”
“You can’t know that.”
“Rochelle tell you I did time?”
“Yeah.”
“Circumstances can always change. I got out. Came home to my family.”
Alexa snorts. “To a wife who despises you.”
“To a daughter I love who has a pain in my ass best friend.” That earns me a smile. “Here.” I dump the suckers in her lap and situate my cup in the holder in the middle of the console.
“Thanks.”
“Don’t mention it.”
Alexa tears the plastic wrapping off one and thrusts it between her sweet lips. My mind flashes to thoughts of those red lips wrapping around something else, and I hate myself a little more, but not nearly enough. We get back on the road and head North to Pennsylvania. I’ve got another two hours of this torture might as well fill the time with conversation.
“What’s the deal with your old man?”
Her shoulder lifts. “He’s an asshole. Wants everything perfect.”
“What happens when you disappoint him?”
“Depends on what I did. Some things will get me grounded from the basics. No Tv. No going out. Other things will lose me a meal. Get me locked in my room. Make me acquainted with his newest belt. But I’m almost out of there.”
“He beat you or just whip you?”
“Is there a difference?”
“Yeah there is.”
“Tell that to him.” She twiddles the end of her braid between her fingers. “He subjects me to a drug test once a month, and I have to take it in front of him.”
“What do you mean you have to take it in front of him?”
“He stands in the doorway to the bathroom while I pee in the cup.”
“Fucking hell.”
“Oh, it gets worse. I don’t know if you know this but my father’s a gynecologist. He um makes me do these exams to check that I’m a virgin. So you see he’ll know. But he’ll blame me. I can’t go back. You can’t make me go back there. If he finds out I don’t know what he’ll do.”
“You let me worry about it.”
“No. You don’t know him. He’ll come after you and the club. You can’t.”
“I’m not afraid of him, Lex. You don’t have to be either.”
“Why?”
“Why what?”