e’s hot, and she’s a fangirl.”
“Fangirl?”
He received a look of derision. “She can geek with the best of them. She knows the names of all the Star Trek TOS episodes, and she understands the wrongness of Jar Jar Binks.”
The Wookiee said something, and the little guy nodded. “That’s true. She doesn’t know anything about anime. It’s her one flaw.”
Keir pinched the bridge of his nose. It was going to be a long, long day.
“I have a couple of questions,” Hamish said from beside Keir. The older man folded his arms over the shirt and tie he insisted on wearing to work every day and frowned at the Wookiee. “In this internet message Mairi wrote, she told you to make your best effort to romance her. Do you really think dressing like a scabby bear and yawning your words is your A-game?” He turned to the little guy. “And for your information, doing it at the speed of light isn’t something you should advertise, son.”
Keir groaned.
???
“What am I going to do?” Mairi said. “I need a plan. And a rope ladder. Amir’s blocked our entrance, and I can’t use the stairs down into the garage or I’ll have to deal with Keir. If I had a rope ladder, I could go out the bedroom window and make a run for it.”
“You’re acting like you really are Rapunzel,” Agnes said. “Get a grip. You can’t run. You need to get online and sort this mess out before the rest of your fake boyfriends turn up.” She stalked to the living room window, which overlooked the Arness main street. “Oh, this can’t be good.”
“What can’t?” Mairi rushed to her side, and together they peeked out from behind the ancient net curtains that had come with the flat. There was a Wookiee standing in the middle of the road, staring up at their windows. “Crap, that’s Jonas.”
He waved, and she waved back. It was all a bit surreal. As she watched, two men came out of the village shop and climbed into a campervan. Twin men. “Oh no.” Mairi groaned. “That’s the Dawson twins.” She watched as they maneuvered the van into the parking lot behind the shop.
“You’re the girlfriend of twins?”
“Fake girlfriend!” Mairi frowned at her sister. “Why can’t anyone remember the fake part?”
“But brothers? Is that even legal?”
“It doesn’t matter if it’s legal or not. It’s fake!” Mairi stomped away from the window. “And to be fair, only one of them is a geek. The other one just talks to me for a laugh. He has plenty of real girlfriends.”
“Oh, well then, that makes it okay.” Agnes perched on the edge of their wobbly dining table. “As long as it’s fake.”
That was it. Mairi’d had enough. She stood in front of her sister, hands on hips, and glared. “You’re being judgmental? Really? When my job helps pay for your study?”
“You’re right. I’m sorry.” Agnes didn’t look even slightly contrite. “But twins?”
“Get a grip. It’s fake. It’s all fake. I don’t even like bloody Star Trek!”
“Mairi,” Amir called. “I am still waiting for your most glorious of answers.”
Mairi stared at the ceiling while she counted to ten. The rope ladder idea was still looking pretty good. She could climb out the window, hitch a lift to Campbeltown and then catch a bus to London. Surely her sister Isobel would put her up for a week or two until this blew over?
“I know what you’re thinking,” Agnes said. “You can’t dump this on Isobel’s doorstep. She needs time to get used to living with Callum. She deserves to be happy. She’s spent her life sorting out other people’s messes. You need to deal with this on your own.”
Mairi sighed. Unfortunately, Agnes was right. Although...Isobel was living with a guy who was a partner in an international security company. A security company with a genius hacker on board. Mairi perked right up.
“I could call Isobel, though, and ask her to get someone to look into who hacked my web page.”
Agnes frowned as she thought about it. “Don’t you think that’s a bit presumptuous? Asking favors from Callum’s business when Isobel’s relationship with him is so new.”
“It’s their honeymoon phase. This is exactly the time to get her to ask him for a favor. Right now, he’d do anything to get her to drop her pants. Not that it takes much.” Their eldest sister was a bit loose with her favors. Unlike Mairi, who was nursing a born-again hymen.
“You could offer to pay,” Agnes said.
They looked at each other and burst into hysterical laughter. Offer was all they could do. Every penny the sisters made had either gone into Agnes’ degree or had been used to help Isobel pay off her ex-husband’s debt.
“I’m calling Isobel,” Mairi said, when she’d calmed down a little. “I have to do something. If she can get someone to undo the mess the hacker’s made, and get me back on my web page, that would be great. I need to tell everyone that I don’t want a husband. I can’t let these guys turn up expecting me to marry one of them. I have thirty online boyfriends—what if they all turn up? What if they camp here forever? You can’t underestimate the stubbornness of a geeky man. They’ll view this like an online game and keep playing until one of them gets the highest score. Me!”