But if they’re going to be on opposing sides, it makes sense that Sal will need Mateo out of the way. If Sal fails to take Mateo out of the way, Mateo will take Sal out of the way.
It never ends, does it? It never ends until somebody I love dies.
Shaking my head, I push up off the floor. Sal gets up to follow me, but I don’t want to be followed. I want to be by myself.
“Francesca…” He catches up and tries to take my hand again, but I yank it away.
“I’m going upstairs.”
“I’ll just follow you,” he states. “I mean, we can change locations if that’s what you want, but…”
I huff, but I storm up the stairs anyway. He follows.
Once we get inside the bedroom, he closes the door and leans against it, looking at me with his solemn gray eyes. “I’m sorry.”
Still guarded, I meet his gaze, wrapping my arms around my own waist. “For what?”
“For what happened tonight,” he says, carefully. “I did not have a hand in it, but I’m sorry it happened.”
“Is it going to happen again?” I ask, but I don’t even give him time to lie to me. “They’ve already shown their hand, they’ve already tried and failed to kill him, now they have to try again, right? Now they have to try harder. Now they have to try to hit him before he hits back.”
Sal’s head falls back, thumping against the door as he sighs. “Please, Francesca. We can talk about anything else, but not this. We have to leave this stuff out of our relationship.”
“But how?” I demand. “It’s my family. It’s your family. People we love. People who matter to each of us. They are a part of us. What happens between our families will affect our relationship. It’s insane to pretend otherwise.”
“You told me your loyalty was mine,” he reminds me.
“And I’m here, aren’t I?” My eyebrows rise. “Did I not help you plot against my own brother? Did I not help you frame the woman he’s in a relationship with to make him think his least favorite moment in history was repeating itself? Did I not leave everything behind to come with you? What have you had to give up, Sal? Who have you really had to betray? Not your family—they just tried to kill my goddamn brother, so obviously they’re operating just fucking fine. Your dad knows about me—my brother’s still in the fucking dark. This is impossible. What we are trying to do is impossible. I can’t go that far. I can leave my family for the competition, but not the people out for my brother’s blood. I can’t hide away in domestic paradise while your family picks off mine. Fuck that.”
Sal doesn’t say anything; he remains with his back against the door and closes his eyes, messaging the bridge of his nose.
Finally he says, “You know I don’t want war with your brother, Francesca. You know that.”
“I know you’ve told me that,” I state, sitting down on the edge of the bed. “I don’t know if it’s true.”
“You think I’d lie to you?” he asks, evenly. He doesn’t sound angry or defensive, but I don’t know how to interpret that. I feel like I know him inside and out, but in rare moments since all this shit got kicked up, I’ve realized there’s a side of him I don’t know. The side he told me I’d never need to know, because it’s the business side, and I’m not business. But this is business. Our relationship isn’t, but his family’s fight with my brother? That’s business.
And it can destroy us.
“Yes,” I finally answer. “Yes, I do.”
He nods wordlessly, watching me. Then he steps out of the way of the door so he can open it, slipping outside to leave me in here by myself, just like I asked for.
—
I don’t know if Sal’s coming up to bed or staying downstairs, so I shut off the lights and climb into bed alone. I can’t fall asleep, though. Too many thoughts are running circles around my head, too many things to worry about.
I can’t believe Meg pushed Mateo out of the way of a bullet. I still have my doubts about her, but for the first time, I consider maybe I haven’t given her a fair chance. I don’t even understand how they were out for Mateo to be targeted in the first place. Meg is supposed to be locked up in the dungeon, and once Mateo uncovered Antonio’s plot, I was sure he’d kill her.
Apparently I was wrong.
I guess I’m glad. I’m still not convinced she’s the right woman for him, but if he’s going to be with the wrong woman, he could do a lot worse than one who would take a bullet for him.
I’m really worried about what the future holds for us all. I don’t know how I build a happily ever after with the man who might be plotting to kill my brother and lying to me about it. Vince’s words come to mind, about how Sal is second-in-command and I’m crazy if I think he’s out of the loop. I want to trust Sal, but I feel like he’s lying to me. The lying itself isn’t even the issue; it would’ve probably scared me off earlier on in the relationship, but I’m in deep enough now that it won’t. I’ve grown up with men who lie when they see fit, in a family where the business side of things was kept from the women just like Sal’s. I know the drill.