He hadn’t even bothered to ask if she’d experienced any discomfort. He hadn’t taken the time to show her that his feelings ran deeper than the need for carnal gratification.
“You’re awake early.”
Her voice sounded deep and languid from sleep, an erotic blend that spoke to his most primal of needs. Yet when he turned to face her, it was his heart that swelled.
“I appear to have fallen asleep somewhat prematurely last night,” he said, walking over to sit on the bed, dismissing the fact the sensations in his chest were new to him. “The least I can do is arrange breakfast.”
“Last night? Gabriel, it was a few hours ago.” She sat up, holding the sheet under her arms to keep it in place, although the sight of her bare shoulders was enough to rouse his manhood to attention.
Gabriel had never taken a woman’s virginity. He had never dealt with the slight awkwardness, with the feeling of wanting to ask intimate questions, but not really knowing how to broach the subject. “Are you alright? After this morning, I mean.”
The words sounded childish and pathetic, but Rebecca’s smile made the world seem a brighter place.
“I’m fine,” she said, her cheeks flushing pink. “It was, well, it was everything I thought it would be.”
His masculine pride could not help but ask, “In a good way?”
“Of course in a good way,” she said with a chuckle. “In an extremely good way.”
Relief flashed through him. “Are you hungry?”
“Ravenous.”
“Perhaps it would be better if we dressed and then ate downstairs.” He did not want his staff to discover Rebecca in his room, but that was not the only reason. A comfortable familiarity clung to him, making him forget to build his barricade, making him feel bare and exposed.
“I’m afraid the best I can do is an itchy nightdress and a wrapper,” she said glancing around in a bid to locate the garments.
“Well, a nightdress is slightly more appropriate than your current state of undress.” He considered jumping back into bed and taking the only sustenance he needed. But he mentally chastised himself for the inability to think of anything other than salacious thoughts. “I shall have some fresh water sent to your room and meet you in the dining room in thirty minutes. It will also give you a moment to think about how you want to proceed.” When she looked a little startled, he added, “You cannot go home, Rebecca. At least not yet.”
She stared at him for a moment.
“We will discuss it over breakfast,” she said with a certain finality, which meant she had already made up her mind.
When he eventually found the courage to tell her about the painting, perhaps she would view things differently.
The thought caused him to swallow deeply.
“Very well,” he nodded as he turned to the door, his weakened position leaving him totally unprepared for her next question.
“I haven’t had a chance to ask you before,” she said, calling out to him, “but I wondered why you never mentioned you had a sister? I assume she lives with her mother.”
Gabriel froze.
The words were said so casually, yet they struck him like a vicious blow. He struggled to turn around and face her, fearing she would see the truth in his eyes. The ridiculous truth — that he blamed them for something, for nothing, for everything.
“We are estranged,” he said coldly. “I provide for them financially, but tend to keep my distance for reasons I do not care to go into.”
He didn’t even want to begin to imagine what she was thinking and fearing another verbal assault, another prying attack, he made his escape in the guise of needing to locate Mrs. Hudson.
As he made his way downstairs, the past weighed heavily on his shoulders. Having Rebecca in the house, seeing her snuggled in his bed, the honest discussions, the comfortable breakfast, all made it feel less like an institute for research, less like a safe haven for scholars and more like a family home.
The words family and home caused panic to flare.
A home should be a place of affection and security. He knew it as a place where deception lay hidden amongst the fake smiles and caring gestures. A place tarnished and dirty, a place of pain and anguish and he had sworn never to put himself in such a predicament again.
For his own sanity, for his own protection, Rebecca Linwood could not stay another night in his house.
Rebecca felt ridiculous sitting in a formal dining room in her nightclothes while Gabriel sat dressed in a navy-blue coat and beige breeches. The staff made no mention of the fact and busied around her as though she was mistress of the house and as such could do as she pleased.