“Don’t,” I told her. My head popped back up and my eyes narrowed warningly. “Audra, it’s not your life. It’s not your business.”
“The hell it’s not!” Audra’s face turned red in a flash. “Who took care of you when he bailed? Who was there, in the hospital, the day…”
I shot Audra a look that was more than a warning. She was treading on extremely dangerous ground and she knew it. Her mouth shut and her face softened slightly. Of all the things I knew about my sister, her protective instinct was the most prominent. When she felt I was heading down the wrong path, she couldn’t help but voice her opinions. Even when they were the last thing I needed or wanted to hear.
“I know you’re worried, okay?” I told her. I tried to keep my voice even and calm, but it was trembling with annoyance. Gently, I reach my hand out and took hers. I squeezed it and said, “I understand. And you know how much I appreciate everything you’ve done for me over the years. You, more than anyone, have stood by me and I love you for it. I really do, Aud. I can’t explain to you how I’m feeling right now. Everything with Logan feels so uncertain and unfinished. Despite everything, I don’t think I ever truly got closure from him. I need to go tonight, okay? And right now, you need to back off. Please.”
Audra opened her mouth to argue, but she closed it almost as fast. With a sigh, she took a step forward and engulfed me in a bone crushing hug. She held me so tightly I thought I was going to suffocate, but I didn’t pull away. I stepped closer and wrapped my arms around her waist. I let her hold me as she silently told me I was stronger than I had ever been before. As my big sister, Audra had seen me at my lowest points in life. She, more than anyone, knew the progress I had made over those last five years. Deep down, I knew her worry stemmed from her desire to keep me on my chosen path. She didn’t want anything derailing the life I had created for myself. Especially not Logan.
“It’s okay to be scared,” she whispered in my ear.
I wouldn’t admit it, but Audra was right. I was terrified of what my dinner with Logan might mean. Our talk in town went well. Better than I ever imagined. But, that still didn’t change our history. There was so much between Logan and me, so much pain and heartache. I knew one dinner could never erase all that, but a part of me hoped it might be a start. At least, a step in the right direction.
“Are you going to tell him?” Audra asked. Her voice was low, soft. I knew she was trying not to upset me again.
I sighed and pulled away from her. I sunk onto the bed and adjusted the heels on my feet into a more comfortable position. Audra waited patiently for my answer, but we both knew I didn’t have one.
“Maybe he should know,” Audra said. “Lilliana isn’t a baby anymo…”
“I know,” I said quickly. I didn’t know if I could handle talking about Lilliana right then. “And honestly, I don’t know what I will or won’t tell him. I don’t think I’ll know until I’m there.”
“That’s fair,” Audra nodded. “And it’s ultimately your decision, but be careful. Once you tell him, you can never take it back. He’ll know. Forever.”
I nodded and gave her another quick hug before grabbing my purse. I hurried from the door without a backward glance. Audra’s words still ringing in my ears.
Sixteen
Piper
Martello’s was a small, hole in the wall, Italian restaurant on the edge of Bradberry. Anthony Martello and his wife, Elena, moved to Bradberry when their youngest child got married almost forty years ago. It was their wish to open an Italian bistro in a small town somewhere. Anthony said it reminded him of the restaurant he worked at as a boy, back in Italy.
I always loved Martello’s. Anytime there was a special occasion or celebration my parents would bring Audra and me. They let us order whatever we wanted, including a plate of cannolis for dessert.
The restaurant hadn’t been the same since Elena died. When she passed, the whole town went into mourning right alongside Martello. He shut down the restaurant for six months. When he opened again, he acted as if nothing happened. He went back to work doing what he loved. He would greet everyone just as he did before his wife’s death. The only difference was the small photograph of Elena that now stood in the middle of the entryway.
When I walked inside that night, my eyes fell on Elena’s picture immediately. Tears filled my eyes without my consent. I hadn’t realized how much I missed Martello’s until that night.
Logan was sitting in the back corner of the restaurant at a table for two. I saw him before he saw me, which gave me the chance to watch him for a few seconds unnoticed. He was staring down at the menu in his hands with a concentrated frown on his face. There were two glasses of water on the table and two empty wine glasses. The scene definitely had the makings of a proper date. The thought made my stomach flip.
As I watched him, Logan flipped the menu over and examined the back. I knew he was just making himself busy. We’d both been here so many times that reading the menu was no longer a necessity. Still, he stared intently, with no idea that I was right there watching him.
His dark eyes were narrowed slightly, but even from where I stood I could see them sparkle. God. Why did he have to be so handsome? It would have been easier if my attraction to him had faded, but it was stronger than ever.
When I finally got up the nerve to walk over to him, my palms began to sweat. The closer I got, the better he looked. His shirt was tight against his chest and I could see the outline of every muscle. My head was spinning. I wanted to run my fingers over those muscles and watch as he…
“Hey,” Logan said as I approached the table. “There you are.”
“Here I am,” I said with an awkward little nod. “Have you been waiting long?”
“No,” Logan shook his head. “Not really.”
“Good.” I smiled and sat down.
Logan handed me a menu and cleared his throat. I waited for him to speak, but he didn’t. Instead, his eyes once again focused on his own menu. Now that I was closer, I could see that he hadn’t shaved in a couple days. His stumble was just beginning to grow past the five o’clock shadow length. It gave him an edgy quality. I couldn’t help but think how sexy it made him look.
He glanced up and caught me staring at him. I looked down quickly, letting my nerves get the better of me, before I remembered my age and laughed. I looked back up apologetically and set my menu down on the table.
“This is ridiculous,” I said boldly. “I don’t know why I’m so nervous.”