The Christmas Deal

“You’re a kid,” Logan said. “That’s what kids do. You think I appreciated everything my mom did for me? No way. Took it for granted until I joined the Marines. And pretty soon she was gone, and I didn’t even get to say goodbye.”

Connor blinked at him, fresh tears streaking his flushed cheeks. “Really? I didn’t know that.”

“Yeah. It sucked. It sucked real hard. I got to talk to her on my CO’s computer, but it’s not the same. She looked so pale and…small. I couldn’t understand how she’d gotten so small, so fast.”

Connor shivered. “Mom was all gray,” he whispered. “Waxy, like she was fake. But it was her. And then they put a sheet over her like she didn’t mean anything. She was everything!”

Logan put his hand over the mound under the comforter where Connor’s knees were. “I know. Your mom and I made a mistake getting married, but I’m so glad I met her. And you.”

Wiping his eyes, Connor snorted. “Yeah, right. You’re just stuck with me.”

“That’s what family’s about. Being stuck with each other.” Hand still on Connor’s knees, he looked at Seth sitting on the other bed. “And sometimes your birth family sucks and they throw you out like Seth’s did. Or they don’t take care of you the way they should, like your dad.”

Logan held his breath, waiting for Connor to freak out and defend his asshole father. But he didn’t. He nodded, sniffling loudly. “My dad sucks.” He looked at Seth. “Your family sucks too.”

“Yeah,” Seth said. “But you know, we get to pick our families too. You and Logan get to pick each other. Your mom brought you together, and you can choose to embrace it.” He smiled wryly. “Maybe give each other a break?”

Logan and Connor looked at each other, and they smiled too. Logan’s chest went warm and gooey. “Yeah, that sounds like a plan, huh?” He jostled Connor’s knees.

“Okay.” He wiped his eyes. “Thanks for rescuing me.”

Logan thought of how bony and fragile Connor had felt under his frozen hands as he’d pushed him up onto the ice. How breakable. He couldn’t let Connor break. Maybe he wouldn’t always do or say the right thing, but he was going to try his hardest every day.

He was going to be the best dad he could.

Logan cleared his throat. “Anytime. Although let’s not do that again. And let’s not… Look, I’m sorry I lied to you about me and Seth. I should have told you the truth, even though it was confusing. Confusing to me, I mean.”

He glanced at Seth, who gave him a little smile. Logan went on, his heart drumming. “Because this was all supposed to be pretend, and it doesn’t feel like that now. It feels real. And I want it to be real. I really like Seth a lot.”

He was still looking at Seth. Seth’s smile grew wider, and he was so pretty and sweet, and yep—Logan wanted to kiss him over and over. He wanted to kiss Seth until their lips hurt. Logan smiled back before looking at Connor again.

Connor eyed him with his brows drawn close. “You really mean it?”

“I do. I’m not trying to steal Seth’s money or anything like that.”

Connor’s cheeks went pink, and he looked down. “I know,” he mumbled. He snaked one hand out from under the covers and pulled at a loose thread on a seam. “Did you cheat on my mom?” He looked Logan straight in the eyes.

“Never.” Logan didn’t have to fake the confidence in what he was saying. “I didn’t cheat on her. We weren’t meant to be together in the long run, but I never even looked at other women.” He hesitated. “Or men. I’m a lot of things, and I sure ain’t perfect, but I’m not a cheater.”

Connor nodded. “I believe you. I think… I think I always knew that.” He dropped his head, then blurted, “I’m sorry I called you stupid so many times. I—you’re not stupid. I just get so mad.” His thin shoulders hunched.

“I get it,” Logan said gruffly. “It’s okay. How about a clean slate? Like Seth said, we can give each other a break.”

“Yeah. Okay.” Connor wiped his nose. “I’m tired. Can I sleep now?” When Logan nodded, Connor curled away toward the dark window, the drapes firmly shut.

“We should all sleep,” Logan said, getting up and crawling across the mattress past Seth. He shimmied under the covers and stretched out on his back.

Seth got settled and switched off the lamp. “Sleep tight, Connor.”

In the darkness, he turned toward Logan, his palm warm and comforting on Logan’s chest. He whispered, “How’s your breathing?”

“Good,” Logan whispered back. Better now.

“It was so hard to breathe after being in that freezing water. Must have been worse for you.” He rubbed his fingers lightly over the spot where Logan’s scars were beneath the cotton.