“You want a home improvement show?” he asked.
“Uh.” Ryn flipped a hand at Boone. “Look at you. You’re camera-ready all the time. We’d have fan clubs in, like, a day and a line of my personally designed décor at Kohl’s in a month.”
“I gotta admit, you’re totally camera-ready all the time,” I entered the conversation. “Both of you.”
Boone shot me a you’re not helping look.
Aug audibly bit back laughter.
I turned to him.
He winked at me.
I felt that wink explode in my sternum.
I want you so bad, I wake up thinking that, and go to sleep grieving that I don’t have it, my mind practically whimpered after catching that wink.
I shot him a lame smile and looked away.
Looking away was hard.
He was insanely beautiful. Like, Michelangelo-would-stop-in-his-tracks-and-get-on-his-knees-and-beg-him-to-be-a-model beautiful.
But it was more.
Augustus Hero was easy to be with.
He was just…
A nice guy.
A good guy.
Good sense of humor. Good with people. Good at making conversation. Good with kids. A good friend.
A good guy.
And he liked me.
He didn’t hide it, and not only the times he’d asked me out.
He was open. Ready for me to go there.
To take us there.
I want to go there, my mind whispered.
No, I need to go there, it shouted.
I could not go there.
Not now.
Not with my ex, who was also my baby daddy, being a huge jerk.
Not with my beloved daughter caught up in his shenanigans.
Corbin had a revolving door of ladies.
That wasn’t going to happen at Mom’s house.
Stability.
Safety.
That was what Juno was going to get from her mom.
“I’m not going to be on a house-flipping show,” Boone declared, and I could have kissed him for breaking into my thoughts.
“We’ll see,” Ryn murmured.
“We won’t,” Boone replied.
“Okay, honey,” Ryn said and then gave me big eyes.
I smiled at her, and even though they were being cute, my mind was at a place where I hoped that smile didn’t look fake.
Because I was sitting by Auggie, and he was a good guy, he was my friend.
But my gut ached.
“What about you?” Auggie asked, his voice lowered in a way that I knew that question was just for me.
I turned to him, thinking about how much I liked his voice, and finding he’d leaned a little into me, so I also caught his smell.
I liked his smell too.
He smelled like…
“Well?” he prompted.
“What about me, what?”
“Any plans for a reality show?”
Not unless people suddenly found it fascinating to watch someone meditate.
I shook my head.
“No plans to take your rad air horns section on the road?”
I blinked, confused. “Sorry?”
“You and Juno. At the wedding. I’m pretty sure Kool and the Gang would hire you and your girl just to add some pizzazz to their act.”
A surprised giggle erupted from me. “Did you just use the word ‘pizzazz’?”
He shrugged. “I call ’em as I see ’em.”
“I must say, we’re full of pizzazz,” I admitted.
“The synchronized kicks were my favorites,” he noted, making that ache achier, at the same time adding a warmth I decided to ignore at how open he was in communicating he was paying attention. Open but without pressure. Auggie had a knack with that. “And you were always on beat with your ‘Yahoos.’”
“You can’t mess up the ‘Yahoos,’” I stated with mock gravity.
He chuckled and the sound, the sight of his humor was so beautiful, I died a little.
To hide it and move beyond it, I shook my head again, this time (fake) smiling, and asked, “Do you have any plans for a show?”
He shook his head too.
“You’d kill on a reality show,” I noted.
His brows went up as his gorgeous lips quirked. “Yeah? Why?”
“Uh, have you looked in the mirror?” I teased. “You wouldn’t have to do anything, except maybe flex a biceps every once in a while, and bam! Instant droves of fans.”
I was so busy trying to be funny, I hadn’t noticed how his eyes shut down as I was talking.
Um.
What was that?
“Did I—?” I began.
“What are you two whispering about?” Boone asked.
I tore my attention from Auggie and caught Ryn giving him a look that stated plain she was just stopping herself from giving him a don’t interrupt them! shove.
But no, none of this matchmaking.
From anyone.
Auggie was my friend. He was cool with Juno. He was a great guy to know. He knew we were the last match, destined for each other, and I couldn’t go there, and he understood why I couldn’t go there, and he was cool about that too.
And as much as I wanted more, that was all I could have.
I figured he’d eventually find someone else, but I didn’t think about that (at all, ever).
As I’d learned in my life, I had what I had, and I had to find a way to be good with it.
And I had to have the patience to wait until that time (should it ever come) where I’d get what I wanted.