The crowd cheers loudly. A scream peels out from the front of the huddle of contestants. Probably Miss Sexy Japan, I think it’s safe to say. She claps a few times excitedly before striding gracefully onto the stage.
“And our first runner-up…”
The announcer allows a dramatic pause here, and Miss Sexy Australia’s leaning forward so far I don’t know how she’s still standing on her feet.
“Miss Sexy Australia!”
The crowd is going nuts for her, but after the announcement, Miss Sexy Australia focuses her glare right back at me, like she’s not satisfied with first runner-up, and it’s somehow my fault.
Does Miss Sexy Australia think I’m one of the fucking judges or something? I smile and gesture for her to get the fuck out on stage. Miss Sexy Australia’s face transforms to a practiced, stately expression just before she marches out on the stage.
Miss Sexy Australia does have her fans—the announcer has to wait a solid minute or so for the cheering to taper off before continuing.
“Well, let’s just get on with it,” I hear. Yeah, let’s. I’m glad it’s almost over.
“Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome the new Miss Sexy Universe…Miss Sexy USA, Kara Gilmore!”
Everything goes blank for a moment as soon as I hear my name. The announcer and the roaring crowd suddenly sound so distant.
Honestly, it’s the last fucking thing I was expecting. It wasn’t even a possibility in my mind.
I should be thrilled, right?
It’s not like I didn’t work my ass off for this. Still, I don’t really feel very excited right now. I just kind of feel like I don’t even want to go out there anymore.
I might not want it, but they’re waiting for me. I start walking onto the stage, trying hard to figure out what the fuck I’m supposed to do now.
Chapter 41
Kara
Muddled music is playing, I’m surrounded by bright lights, and the crowd goes from sounding kind of loud to fucking deafening once I’m onstage.
I would’ve appreciated this deafening applause after my speech, but I guess the audience has come to accept me now that I’m the winner.
Yep, the winner. Miss Sexy fucking Universe. That’s me, apparently.
I won’t deny it—I dedicated my life to preparing for this shit, at least for a while. All that time, all that work...I think about my adorably determined past self, grinding away, with the goal of winning a naked beauty pageant.
I stop halfway across the stage. I try to look at the audience, but there’s a blinding spotlight on me.
Now that I’m right in the thick of it, in the culmination of all that effort, I consider what goal that the old Kara, working so hard to prepare for a beauty pageant, had in mind.
Was this it?
Bright lights, cameras, a whole lot of fucking eyes on me while someone waits for me with a tiara and a fake smile—was this the dream of past Kara?
More importantly, is this the dream of the present Kara? Because I’m supposed to be fucking living it, and I don’t want to sound ungrateful, but whatever dream I’m living right now, I know for sure it’s not mine.
Another thing I’m certain of is that I can’t just fucking stand here in the middle of the stage all day, with everyone staring at me.
I continue my walk to the center of the platform, still not really able to see shit because of the spotlight. I guess they break out the really bright shit for the winner.
I don’t know where I am on the stage now, but I’m formulating a plan to just keep walking all the way until I’m out of view again.
Then, I’ll just leave.
What would happen? It would be pretty fucking funny. At least, I think it would be.