“Yeah. He really wanted the hoodie, though, so we splurged.”
To me, she says, “Can I have the rest of the day off?”
“Um, yeah. Sure.”
She walks off, up the stairs, and a moment later, returns. “Come on, Jackson. Henry, I’ll walk you out. See you later, Elias.” They walk out of the house.
Immediately, and for the first time, I feel like my gut was wrong and it betrayed me.
“Rae, is everything okay?” Henry asks as we walk into the garage.
“Fine.” This world expanding business is not for me. What kind of boyfriend asks me out of the blue if I want to get with my ex? Tha
t’s basically what just happened. And not just any ex, but Henry!
He gently grabs my elbow as I open the back door of my car for Jackson. “Rae.” I thought that word lost its meaning for me since he’s been around, but hearing it right now causes all the hurt from the past to resurface on top of my confusion caused by my conversation with Elias and I want to curl up in my bed and cry.
Instead, I motion for Jackson to get in since he’s watching us closely. “I just want us to get out of the house, Henry,” I say as I lean in to buckle Jackson in.
“What are y’all going to do?”
“I don’t know,” I say with a huff and annoyance bleeding through my tone as I stand upright and close Jackson’s door. All I want right now is to get far, far away from this house. I wish I’d grabbed my laptop, but no way am I walking back in there now.
“You’re upset,” he whispers. My shoulders sag. If Henry can tell, then Jackson can too. “Can I come with you? Drive y’all wherever you want to go?”
I don’t have it in me to argue with him, so I hand over my keys. Soon, he’s backing out of the driveway and driving to an unknown destination, if he even has one in mind. Henry takes us to a fast food restaurant.
“What are we doing here?” I ask. They had lunch not too long ago.
“Milkshakes,” he answers simply.
So, we order milkshakes and take a seat at a booth. Jackson wants to play in their playhouse, of course, but Henry tells him he has to finish his milkshake first. We have small talk, about their day together, about Jackson returning to school soon with Christmas break ending, and about his upcoming skating lessons because Jackson talks about that at least once a day. Jackson seems to finish his milkshake in record time and escapes to the playroom.
“Want to talk about it?” Henry asks as I eye my son. Luckily, it’s not too busy in there right now.
“About what?”
“Whatever caused so much tension to be in the house when Jackson and I got there.”
Maybe if I handle this now with Henry, I can go home and tell Elias that he is in fact crazy and can stop whatever nonsense he started. “Do you have feelings for me?” I glance over at Henry to find his mouth parted slightly. He stares at me without answering until I nudge him with a, “Well?”
“I never stopped loving you, Rae,” he answers quietly. My heart stops beating and my lungs still in my chest. I certainly never expected him to say that. “But when I came down here, you could’ve sent me to hell on the spot with the look in your eyes. And I didn’t come here for you. I came for Jackson. I can’t undo what I did, Rae, and I don’t think we’ll ever have a second chance. That’s okay, as long as I get to be a father to Jackson.” His eyes drift away from me to where Jackson plays.
I don’t know what to say. Elias put me in this position and I don’t know why. Where am I supposed to go from here? What else am I supposed to discuss with Henry in order to satisfy Elias? I don’t even understand what Elias is after with this.
“You’ve moved on, right, Rae?” Confusion colors Henry’s voice.
“Yes. Even if I wasn’t with Elias,” my head shakes, “I couldn’t.” My eyes find Jackson who waves at me before he jumps into the ball pit. “Between your parents and mine, what happened between us, and everything else, it’s too much to get over. Co-parenting is much easier. It’s all I want.” I’m not so sure I’m still with Elias. He said he wasn’t breaking up with me, but it certainly didn’t sound like it.
“That’s what I figured. Have I somehow messed things up between you and EJ?”
I shake my head. “No.” Should I tell him more? Maybe he could tell me what the hell is going on. That doesn’t seem wise, all things considered, so I stay quiet.
“But something has happened?” he presses.
“Stay out of it, Henry,” I warn as Jackson runs out of the playroom and climbs into my lap.
“Don’t you want to play with me, Momma?”