“I’m talking about when we were freshmen in med school,” Russ says, his voice rising, though it remains steady. “Back when I had nowhere to go, no home or money or even food. You were my best friend, John, even then, and you never even noticed. Didn’t you wonder why I looked the way I did in classes? Did you wonder why I filled my pockets with leftovers every time we splurged on a trip to the dining hall?”
My father’s face shifts from an angry red to a washed-out pale. “What… what are you talking about?”
“You really never noticed, the way I never talked about family, or the way I skipped nights out drinking with the other guys in our class…”
“I thought you were just more serious. That you wanted to study more.”
“You used to even make fun of me.” Russ laughs softly, not a happy sound. “You told me I should buy more than one shirt. You didn’t know I literally couldn’t. Because how could you guess that? You’d have to actually be paying attention to the people around you to notice it.”
My father’s mouth hangs open completely, now.
“I was homeless, John. For two whole months. And my best friend never even noticed. What kind of friendship is that?” Russ shakes his head sadly, and squeezes my hand gently, where his fingers are still entwined in mine, at our sides. “Come on, Maggie,” he murmurs in a quieter voice now. “I think our work here is done for today.”
“It most certainly is. Get out of my house. Both of you,” Dad finishes in a low, threatening growl. “And don’t let me see you at the hospital either.”
“Maggie.” My mother’s eyes finally meet mine. She tilts her head, a question written all over her face. Is this really what you want?
I might not feel bad about hurting my father right now, but I do feel bad about Mom. She didn’t ask for any of this. She’s the only one who’s always known how to stand up to Dad, but even she can’t help how he treats everyone else in his life. The only thing that breaks my heart right now is leaving her alone with him, to sort out the mess that he caused.
But what else can I do? Just like Russ is who I want to be with, Dad is who she wants to be with. I understand that. I just can’t put up with him doing this kind of stuff anymore, even for her sake.
So I squeeze Russ’s hand in return and let him lead me out of the house. Behind us, I hear my mother’s breath hitch, and I ignore a guilty twinge. She’s crying. Because of me. Because of what we decided to do just now.
But Dad’s the one who told us to leave. Dad’s the one who keeps setting all these ultimatums. I won’t fall into line after him like a good little soldier. Not anymore.
We march out onto the back porch. Once the fresh air hits, my breathing comes faster, quicker. Russ pauses just next to where he parked his car and reaches down to cup my cheeks between his palms. “You okay?” he whispers, so close our noses touch, and his breath dances like frost in the chilly morning air.
“I’m okay,” I breathe. His lips touch mine, brief and faint. Just enough to keep me standing, moving, for now. As long as I have him, I can handle this.
Then I remember everything that happened in there—everything—and a faint smile rises to my lips once more. “Did you mean it? You love me.”
His eyes dance where they find mine. “I think you knew that already, Maggie. And you love me too.”
“I do.” I grin, and he kisses me again, slower. When we break apart, I feel energized once more. Able to face all of this. I cross around to the passenger side and climb into the car with slow movements. Inside, I fasten my seat belt, and for a moment, we both just sit there and consider the big, empty, dark house. Behind us, out on the street, I spot Dad’s car parked sideways in a spot, as if they sped into a street parking spot just so they could run inside and run back out again. I guess they really were searching for me. Stopping by quickly to scan the property.
I check my phone, which I left on the seat of Russ’s car, and find a couple of missed calls, all from Mom’s line. I wonder why they only tried calling me in the morning, if they were out so early hunting the streets for me. But then I remember that I had my phone turned off back at Russ’s. I guess whatever they had to say to me, they didn’t want to do it in a voicemail.