“I’d like to give you a special gift on your graduation day.”
“What is this special gift?”
“An engagement ring,” he said. “Don’t look so shocked and frightened,” he added, laughing.
“But I am,” I confessed.
“What would you do if I gave you such a gift that day? Would you accept it?”
“I don’t know,” I said. “I know I want to do what I said. I want to become a nurse.”
“There’s no problem with that.”
“I don’t know.”
“You still have strong feelings for Ignacio?”
“I’m going to sound like—what you call it—a broken record.”
“You mean you don’t know?”
I nodded. “I am very confused,” I said.
He smiled and reached for my hand. “You have every right to be, but maybe I can help you get rid of the confusion.”
“How?”
“Like this,” he said.
He leaned in to kiss me and then kept his face close to mine so we could do nothing more than look into each other’s eyes.
“I can’t get your eyes out of mine,” he whispered. “Even when I look into the eyes of other girls, I see your eyes, Delia. Whether you realize it or not, you’ve set your anchor in me.”
He kissed me again, longer this time. The taste of his lips made my head spin.
“Delia,” he said, his lips grazing my cheek and my earlobe, “I need you and want you to need me. Nothing that’s happened has changed that or ever will.”
All my days of pain and turmoil had cut the legs out from beneath my sense of caution. I brought my lips back to his, I felt his level of excitement. His hands moved up and around to slip under the top of my bathing suit and easily lift it away from my breasts. The cool air felt good on my hardened nipples, which eagerly accepted his lips and the tip of his tongue. I moaned as he kissed his way down to my belly button and below, gracefully undoing the bottom of my suit. In the distance, I heard the birds cawing as if they were trying to warn me against myself, as if the voices of my ancestors were being transmitted from beyond.
But I was unable to deny that I had fantasized about this moment many times, that I had struggled, mostly in vain, to put it out of my mind. He was mounting me and chanting my name as if not saying it would shut some door and destroy the magic bubble around us. I didn’t surrender to him as much as I drew him into me, demanding that he surrender all of his essence, uncover his soul, be completely naked and honest. When I realized there was no turning back, I surged forward. The ocean lifted and dropped us gently, as if it were trying to mimic our love rhythms. The wind eagerly scooped up my cries and carried them over the water. We held each other so tightly it was as if we were literally trying to absorb each other.
I heard my cries of pleasure as they echoed down the corridors of ecstasy leading to my very soul. “Delia,” he whispered. “Delia, I love you.”
We did not let go of each other when it ended, either. We lay there entwined until both of us began to breathe normally and both our hearts stopped thrashing inside our chests. Then he turned over, quickly put his bathing suit on, and tossed a towel over me. I closed my eyes and turned on my side.
“Just relax,” he said. “I’ll get us under way. I know this great restaurant that has its own dock. It’s not far.”
I didn’t reply, and I didn’t open my eyes until I felt the boat moving quickly and bouncing harder on the water. I had been lying there anticipating my inner voice start to reprimand me, stir regrets, bring me to tears, but I heard nothing but the echo of my own pleasure. I’m still smiling, I thought. This must be right.
I dressed and took a cold drink. Adan beckoned for me to climb up to the bridge. He held out his hand, and I stood beside him looking out at the water while he put his arm around my shoulders to draw me closer to him.
“You okay?” he asked, and kissed my cheek.
I nodded, but I wondered if he could feel me trembling inside.
“I’m really hungry,” he said. “You?”
“Yes.”