“He’s okay. He has the Good Sexkeeping Seal of Approval,” she said nonchalantly, and started the car. As we drove out, she slowed down and turned to me, “But as for him initiating you, that’s not his decision—or yours, for that matter.”
“What do you mean?”
“We’ll bring it up at the next meeting, and the members will vote on it. There are four other boys who are approved for initiations, right now only four boys.”
“You mean everyone votes on which boy each girl is with for the first time?”
“Of course. That way, no one makes a serious mistake. When I said I was going to be your protective older sister, I meant it,” she said. “It’s the least I can do for you, and I appreciate your letting me do it. We’re all sisters now. The members of the club think clearly and carefully about each girl’s sexual experiences. Everyone there has far more experience than you have. Why shouldn’t you benefit from their experiences? Believe me, my mother wouldn’t be any sort of adviser when it comes to sex. Sometimes I think she and my father stopped doing it.
“Despite what some people tell you, sex for the first time is the most important time. Our four boys know how to make love to a virgin. There have been no complaints,” she added, smiling.
We drove on.
It was on the tip of my tongue to ask, but I didn’t. Whatever happened to love?
28
Decision
A strange thing happened at school during the days that followed. The more I hung out with the older students, whether at lunch or talking to them in the halls between classes and going with Kiera and the others to malls or restaurants, the more invisible I became to my classmates. Those who had once been impressed with my being so lovey-dovey with a senior boy were now indifferent to me. No one said hello or even nodded at me. They walked past me as though I weren’t there.
I continued to do well in class and improve on the clarinet, but when Mr. Denacio announced that I would have a seat in the senior band and issued me a uniform, everyone else in the class took it as if it had been expected. It wasn’t so much an achievement as simply another assumed step. Big deal was written across their faces. Ironically, Kiera and the club members were the only friends I had. No one my own age would give me the time of day.
One Wednesday, Kiera told me that we were having a meeting of the VA club at Deidre’s house after school on Friday, and I was the main topic. She asked me how my period had been since she had given me her pill. I had gone through it far better than any time I had had it before and told her so.
“My doctor says we should take the pill afterward, too,” she said. “It will prevent you from having those severe cramps next time. These are for you. Take one every day now.”
I thanked her and took one every morning as her doctor had prescribed. As Friday drew closer, I was even more nervous for the VA club meeting than I had been the first time. After all, it was to be all about my first sexual experience.
&
nbsp; The other girls were already there when we arrived, sitting in the same places. They all looked very serious. I saw the pictures of four boys on the coffee table: Ricky, Boyd, Ruben Weiner, and Tony Sussman. Deidre brought a chair for me and put it in the center so I’d face all of the girls.
“We didn’t ask you last time,” Margot began, “but how much experience do you have? How far have you gone with a boy?”
I looked at Kiera, but she was just as serious and stone-faced as they were.
“All I’ve ever done with a boy I did at Marcia’s party with Ricky,” I said.
“Just kiss?” Marcia said, squinting and crinkling her nose as though kissing were more disgusting. “What, did you grow up in Disneyland?”
“There’s no reason to pick on her,” Kiera said. “You weren’t exactly Miss Sophisticated when we brought you into the club.”
Marcia blushed and sat back.
“That still leaves Tony out. He moves too fast, assuming the girl has been on the verge,” Deidre said. “Everyone agree?”
They all nodded, and she turned Tony’s picture over.
“Can she go on a date? Will your mother permit it?” Doris asked.
“I doubt it,” Kiera said. “My mother refuses to see her as anything but a ten-year-old, and she has this thing about added responsibility for her.”
“She doesn’t look ten now,” Margot said. “I want to know where you got that fuchsia outfit you wore the other day.”
I looked at Kiera. Hadn’t she ever worn it?
“Like it will look as good on you,” Doris muttered.