I love watching him do things, strong hands sure and steady, that look of concentration on his handsome face. I love learning from him. He knows lots of practical stuff.
He doesn’t say it, but his dad must have taught him to make s’mores, just like he taught him to prepare a fire pit and light a fire, chop wood, fix broken appliances and engines. He rarely talks about his childhood, not willingly, not more than glimpses into the events that shaped him.
It’s okay. I tell myself we have time. Without prison looming over his head, with the support of his family and John Elba’s long protective shadow, Ross has relaxed more. My dad says he likes him, Josh has even condescended to play videogames with him, and as for me... He spends every free moment he has at my side. He looks... happy. Really happy. The shadows that normally haunt his eyes seem to be fading.
He spends time at the garage sometimes, and always invites me over to help him fix this or that engine. His Harley has been laid aside. He told me he’s not in a hurry to fix it, or go anywhere.
The police have caught the gang, and Destiny is now a quieter place. A nicer place. Turns out quite a few people like Ross, and the fights and beatings are a thing of the past. Even his boss at work has finally started to warm up to him.
The other news is that Merc thinks he has an idea who the second victim was—the mother of their other brother. He’s acting like he’s on a secret mission, and Ross loves teasing him about it, though the whole family is sort of waiting with bated breath to see if he manages to locate the elusive Finn, half-brother to them all.
“Give them here.” He beckons and I give him the package of marshmallows, crouching beside him. The warmth of the fire plays over my face, makes me smile. “Here’s how you do this...”
I watch as he spears them deftly in neat rows, how he places them over the crackling coals, and think how amazing it is to have him here, with me, after everything that’s happened. He settles the skewers over the coals, turning them here and there, then reaches out and snags an arm around me, pulling me against him.
“Ross!” I almost topple on top of him, and he snickers, sitting down and hauling me on his lap. “You’re nuts.”
“Nuts for you,” he says and sticks his tongue out at me. “Always. Since the beginning.”
I let that sink in one more time. He always thought me pretty, always thought me clever... always wanted me. Me, as I was, as I am, and the new me decides that my old me wasn’t all that bad after all... A bit scared maybe. Insecure. But I’m still the same person. Still Luna. I only needed to find my strength, my faith in myself, and help Ross find his. It wasn’t my lack of a thigh gap that was the issue, or what others said about me, but what I believed to be the truth.
And the truth is... I’m good enough. I’m fine. God, it took me so long to realize it. I’ll only be good enough if I accept myself, first.
Plus... Ross likes me just the way I am.
Buddy whines from his other side, then barks, breaking through my thoughts. “Hey, doggy,” I mutter distractedly. “What do you want?”
“Do you think he’d like a s’more?” Ross asks seriously and I look up and right into his pretty pale eyes.
Focusing on his question takes effort. “He shouldn’t. Dogs shouldn’t have sugar. I brought some of his treats.”
“Hear that, Buddy? You get doggy sweets.”
“Woof,” Buddy says seriously. Sometimes, I swear, he acts like he understands everything we say. He’s a dog-human. A human-dog. He’s our friend, and now that Ross has decided to stay at his dad’s house, Buddy splits his time between the two houses, this one and my own. It’s a new tradition. We’re setting up a new routine as the days pass. A new life.
We decided to stay in Destiny, at least until Joshua finishes school, and then we’re thinking of moving to St. Louis. Matt Hansen has his own garage there and has offered Ross a job. I could work there, go to college... Dad and Josh would follow us eventually. It could become our new home.
I think I’m coming to terms with being back in Destiny. It’s looking nicer by the day, and these warm evenings by the river, in Ross’s yard, are memories I’ll cherish forever.
Ross has been silent, and I nudge him in th
e ribs. “Penny for your thoughts?”
“Make it a dollar and you’re on.”
I nudge him again, snickering, wind an arm around his neck. “You drive such a bargain.”
“I know.” He sighs. “But my thoughts aren’t worth your pennies. I was just thinking that the summer is almost over... Winter is on its way. And...” His voice has dropped to a hush. “It’s okay.”
“Of course it’s okay,” I whisper, not sure what brought on this strange mood. “They’re just seasons. We will be together, through winter and summer, wind and rain. Right?”
“Right,” he breathes. He gives me one his rare, real grins that lights up his eyes and transforms his face. “Yeah, goddammit, that’s right.”
I squeak when a very hard, demanding mouth lands on my own. Whatever else I was about to say or ask is gone in a deep kiss that has me wrapping my limbs around him, in a bid to get closer to him.
Buddy whines, and we break apart, panting.
“Well...” I lick my lips, my thoughts a train wreck. “Glad that was cleared up.”