Ellis shakes her head. “That’s horrible.”
“He failed, of course, but in the end, he still won. He took out his frustration on three innocent people, shooting them to death, then put my hard work to waste by killing himself.”
Ellis clasps a hand over her mouth. I know what she’s thinking – that that’s even more horrible. And she’s right. It was.
There’s nothing more horrible than knowing you took away more lives by saving one.
I let out a sigh. “And that’s why I don’t do surgeries for people who don’t specifically want my help, pro bono or not.”
“But…”
I hold a finger to her lips, which still have a sheen of cocoa and look into her blue eyes. “Enough about me. I want to know about you, Ellis.”
“Okay.” She pulls her face away. “Ask me anything.”
I grin. “I think I have a better way to get to know you.”
I grasp Ellis’s chin, lean forward and brush my lips against hers. She grabs my wrist.
“Rainier.”
I move my hand to her cheek and stroke it as I kiss her lips firmly. When she parts them, I slip my tongue inside her mouth. It rubs against hers and I taste cocoa.
Sweet.
I play with her tongue, which eventually moves against mine. Ellis kisses me back a few times, but then she pulls away and shakes her head.
“I can’t do this.”
I lean towards her. “Yes, you can.”
She pushes me away. “No, Rainier. I already told you yesterday. I’m not going to keep doing this.”
I take some strands of her hair between my fingers. “That was before we worked so brilliantly together. You heard Dr. Carver. We make a good team. We can be good for each other.”
Ellis tucks the strands behind her ear and says nothing, but I can sense her hesitation.
I sigh. “Don’t tell me you’re still scared of what others will think. All the attending physicians know you’re a good doctor. And as for your fellow interns…”
“Did you talk to them?” Ellis asks me. “Yesterday, did you talk to them about me?”
“I just asked where you were,” I answer.
Ellis doesn’t look like she believes me. “That’s all?”
I touch my neck. “And I told them to stop gossiping about one of their own.”
Ellis sighs.
My gaze narrows. “What’s wrong with that?”
“What’s wrong is that now they think you’re my boyfriend. And I’m pretty sure that’s what most people at the hospital think, too.”
“And that’s wrong because?”
“Because you’re not,” Ellis tells me.
I cock my head. “And you don’t want me to be? Why are you here, then?”
She shrugs. “You had fireplaces and snow globes.”
I scratch my head. Right.
“Plus I thought maybe we could be friends, since like you said, like Dr. Carver said, we make a good team.”
“Friends?” My eyebrows arch. “You want us to be just friends?”
Ellis nods. “God knows I need a few at the hospital to survive.”
“And what if I don’t want to be just a friend, hmm?”
She frowns. “Why are you pushing this? You threw me away, remember? You didn’t want anything to do with me after you found out that I was a virgin before you had sex with me.”
“I know,” I tell her. “But then I found out other things. I learned more about you.”
“So now you want me?”
“Yes.”
The straightforwardness of my answer takes Ellis by surprise. She recovers, though, and gets on her feet.
“Well, I don’t want this.” She shakes her head. “I don’t.”
I snort. “Are you saying you don’t want me?”
Because I can tell that she does. Hell, she just kissed me back moments earlier.
Ellis takes a deep breath. “I’m saying I don’t want a man who just wants me for sex. I want a man who loves me, who wants to understand me and take care of me, not a man who just wants to own me.”
I almost roll my eyes.
“I want a relationship, not just sex. I want commitment, not convenience. I want – ”
“A man who gives you flowers for your birthday,” I finish the sentence for her. “Who cooks for you. Who kisses you on the forehead and whispers ‘I love you’ every night.”
She shrugs. “Well, those don’t sound bad, but my point is – ”
“I get your point, Ellis,” I cut her off a second time. “I know what you’re trying to say – that I’m not the man for you.”
“No.” She shakes her head. “You’re not.”
I look away and tap my fingers on the couch. Unbelievable. She’s really pushing me away. Again. And this time, I think she means it.
Ellis is the first woman I’m interested in who doesn’t want me.
“Fine,” I say. “Clearly, I can’t be someone I’m not.”
“No,” she agrees.
A moment of awkward silence falls on the room.
Ellis breaks it as she glances towards the door. “You know what? I have to go. I have work in a few hours and I have some stuff I have to do.”