“Is it really you?” Will asked. He finally sank down in the chair that Megan had kicked toward him.
And then Marley fell against him, resting between his splayed legs, her cheek against the chest that I knew was solid as a rock. He palmed the back of her head and stared at me while he held her.
“What have you done?” he asked me.
This time, I didn’t even try to stop the tears that scalded my cheeks. I let them flow. I didn’t wipe them away. I let them fall, tasting the briny saltiness of my own regrets. “I did what was right.” I laid his weapon on the table behind him. “You’ll thank me for it later.”
“I don’t understand,” he replied. His face was white with shock, so I called 9-1-1 and walked outside. Marley was back, and he would want to hold her and love her and kiss her. He would want to be with Marley. I didn’t want to intrude on their moment.
So I sat down on the steps and I waited for the ambulance. I waited for the only man I’d ever loved to leave with the woman he loved. And he did. He left in an ambulance, with Marley holding his hand the whole way.
I’d been through a lot in my life, and I’d done a lot in my life, but I’d never felt a pain so severe as when I watched them leave together in the back of that ambulance. It was sharp. It was brutal. And it was final.
My time with Will was finished, and it was my own fault. I’d brought her back. Now someone would get a happily-ever-after, but it wouldn’t be me.
Chapter 39
Clark
John Spanner looked at me from his chair next to my bed at the hospital. “I’ve never seen such a colossal fuck-up as when you’re involved.” He snorted and rubbed a weary hand down his face. He had barely left me the whole time I’d been here. I’d arrived by ambulance twelve hours before, with Marley clutching tightly to my hand. She’d refused to let me go. It was both disconcerting and right all at the same time. I was just as hesitant to let her go. I was afraid that if I did, I’d lose her again. I knew she’d vanish right before my eyes. She’d still be there, but not.
I’d once loved Marley desperately, but I realized now that the love I still felt for Marley was more like that of a friend. I knew that because now I knew how real love felt. I knew how it felt to think fondly of someone, and now I knew how it felt to be in love. I loved Shelly. I had loved her from the beginning, when she’d let herself into my office and buried her bare feet in my carpet. I’d loved her when she was driving me crazy. And I’d loved her when she was out-thinking the fuck out of me. I’d loved her, and nothing would ever compare with that kind of love. My feelings for Marley were in the past, mainly because Shelly took up all of my present.
“I’m ready to go home,” I said.
John stared at me and shook his head. “She’s not there.”
I jerked my gaze up to meet his. “Where is she?”
“I don’t know. Her sister came and picked her up from the station this morning after they finished questioning her.”
So she was with Lynn. At least I knew she was safe. “Okay,” I said on a heavy breath. I was bone-weary and didn’t know what would happen next. But it was okay. I would figure it out.
“So she’s the one, huh?” he asked. He drummed his fingers on the arm of the chair.
“Yep.” No doubt about it.
“What about Marley?”
“What about her?”
“She’s going to a lock-down facility.”
“I know.” Her alter egos had killed people. They couldn’t remain free. She would go to a special facility where she could live her life, but still be locked away for everyone’s safety. She would get therapy. Mason’s parents, who were specialists in the field of Dissociative Identity Disorder, were taking over her care. “I talked to her yesterday.” She had been so confused. She’d been gone for years. She had no idea what was going on. The doctors would have to decide how much they could tell her and when. “I can’t be more than a friend to her. I’m in love with someone else.”
“Why Shelly?” he asked.
I shrugged. “I don’t know. Back when I first met her, I thought she was fucking nuts, but she’s not. She sees the world differently than other people do, and the way that she sees it is part of what I love about her. She’s kind, considerate, helpful, thoughtful, and she needs me as much as I need her. And I can’t imagine life without her.”
Suddenly, the door banged open and slammed against the wall. I jumped, but my side hurt when I moved. MeeMaw stormed into the room. “I go away for a week and someone calls me and tells me that you’ve been shot!” she cried. She shook her finger at me. “How dare you get shot when I’m not even in the state!” Her voice quavered and I knew that anger wasn’t the only driving force behind her tirade. She was petrified with fear.
“MeeMaw,” I said softly, and I opened my arms to her. She leaned over and very gently wrapped her arms around me, squeezing me tenderly. “Next time I get shot, I’ll try to plan it for a time when you’re at home,” I said cheekily.
She made a rude noise in my ear and pinched my upper arm. “Don’t ever go and get shot again,” she warned. “If you do
, I’ll have to kill you myself.” She pinched me again, and I rubbed my arm to take the sting away.
“Yes, ma’am,” I replied. “Will you stop pinching me?”