“Fitting comment coming from you,” he says as he steps over the threshold and into my home. He holds his trench coat in his hand, but I don’t offer to take it from him. His comment has me reeling, hating him for bringing up the fact that I did the exact same thing to him once after he left me. It wasn’t one of my finer moments, but I was pregnant and desperate.
“Where is she?” he asks as he walks around my apartment. He picks up her school photo and holds it in his hands. He smiles briefly before setting it back on my mantel.
“Getting dressed.”
“Did you tell her about me yet?”
I shake my head. “Nope. It’s really not a conversation I planned to have on Christmas Eve.”
“It gets done today, Saylor, and frankly it should’ve been done a long time ago.”
“And what would I have said about why you missed her birthday, Christmas, and everything important to her over the years?”
“I would’ve been here if you had asked.”
“See? That’s the problem, Elijah. I shouldn’t have to ask or remind you. You should be here because she’s your daughter, not because you got a phone call.”
I leave him standing there and go into Lucy’s room. She’s sitting at her small table, coloring. “What are you coloring?” I ask as I crouch down next to her, only to find a picture of Travis, along with other BoRe players.
“Travis gave it to me.”
“That’s very sweet of him.”
She nods and continues to color his jersey red.
“Come on—there is someone here to see you.”
“Is it Travis?” she asks again, and I shake my head, watching as her face falls. She sets her crayon down and places her hand in mine. My heart beats a thousand times a minute while my palms begin to sweat. I swear I’m about to have a heart attack the closer we get to the living room. Elijah owns me right now, and he isn’t afraid to make everyone around me pay if he doesn’t get what he wants.
Elijah is still snooping when we come back in, and when he looks at Lucy, she molds into my leg. He saunters over, trying to show her that he’s a man who should be revered. Too bad she doesn’t give a shit.
“Hi, Lucy. I’m Elijah. Do you remember me?” He extends his hand to shake hers, but she doesn’t budge.
“Hi,” she mutters.
He sighs and looks at me. I shrug, hoping he understands that he’s on his own. I’d probably be more willing to help him out if I had kept her from him, but I hadn’t. He kept himself from her. I have no sympathy for him.
We stand awkwardly in the middle of the room while he stares down at Lucy. You would think that for a man with children, he’d be less rigid, that he’d be more fatherly, but instead he’s all business.
Lucy grows impatient under his gaze and starts to fiddle with the hem of my dress. Normally, I’d find something to distract her, but I’m afraid that whatever I do, Elijah will take it as a sign that he’s welcome to stay, and he’s not.
“Mommy, can I go back to my room?”
“No,” Elijah barks out, causing us both to jump. I glare at him, hoping he can see the rage in my eyes. He has no right to speak to her like that. As far as I’m concerned, she’s my daughter, not his. Lucy clings to my leg, turning her head away from Elijah. Her soft cries break my heart.
“I think you should go, Elijah.”
“You know that isn’t happening, Saylor.” His eyes are cold and dark. The venom behind his words is meant to threaten me, and it does.
I nod, remembering his threat all too well. The call late last night was not only to warn me that he and his family were coming to town but also to voice his displeasure over Lucy spending time with Travis. It seems that our skating adventure had made it into the papers, unbeknownst to me, and Elijah doesn’t want Lucy anywhere near Travis. I defended Travis, letting Elijah know that Travis hasn’t been charged with any crimes, to which he replied with a terse “yet” and then proceeded to remind me that he’s very good friends with the district attorney. That was enough to give me pause and left me with no choice but to open the door for him today.
“Elijah has something to tell you.”
This time he squats down and tugs on one of her curls. I have to stare at Lucy because I don’t want him seeing that he’s getting the best of me. I feel her head turn against my leg as she looks at him.
“I’m your father, Lucy.”
She shakes her head, and big fat tears start to fall. “But I want Travis to be my daddy.”