Beautiful Mistakes

And the father wasn't supposed to be married to someone else.

Bad call, she realized on reflection.

Another mistake to add to the pile, she thought as Emma and Matt leaned in toward each other conspiratorially and then Matt nodded, heading into the kitchen.

Julie closed the door, no longer wanting to witness whatever was going on between them. Opening up the package, she briefly looked over the directions and then she started the test.

Her head was aching and her brain was working fast—Jack might not even let her stay with him until she could find somewhere else to stay, and she couldn't find somewhere else to stay unless she had a job to pay for it.

Searching her mind, a flyer popped up in her mind, a babysitter needed on Thursdays… but that wouldn't be enough to pay for an apartment, and she couldn't work full-time and expect to be able to do well in school, especially not if she really did turn out to be pregnant. How would she be able to fit a baby into that schedule? Or the budget—how could she pay for all the things a baby would need by herself? She didn’t even have any friends in Chicago to throw a baby shower for her, so she couldn’t even count on that to help out with some of the things people usually got from friends and family when they had a baby. Would she be able to stay in school full-time? She couldn't even fit her boyfriend into her schedule, and as needy as he was, he wasn't as needy as an infant. Who would watch her baby while she was at work and school?

The father obviously would be of no use, she thought a little sardonically, glaring at the door as if it could penetrate to the other side where Matt stood with his wife, plotting against her.

His wife. The one that, prior to the possible pregnancy scare, he had seemed not to be very fond of.

Boy did they seem like good old friends now, she thought ironically, trying not to feel nauseous as she visualized the two of them outside the door, waiting to see what would happen. In a time of crisis, apparently they were partners.

She had always heard that the two minutes you had to wait for your pregnancy test results were the longest two minutes of your life, but she was so busy trying to construct a new life in her mind that she didn't even realize it had been two minutes until she heard a knock at the door.

"Julie?" Matt asked.

"Yeah?" she called back.

There was a hesitation. "Um…are you…okay?"

By "okay" she figured he probably meant "not pregnant," so she figured it was probably time to look at the results.

Julie took a deep breath and let it out. "All right," she murmured to herself, thinking that whatever the result was, she would remain calm.

Matt had bought the digital tests just to make sure there would be no misunderstandings, and as Julie picked up the test, fully expecting to see "Not Pregnant," she found herself falling back down on the toilet seat as she stared at the stick in front of her face.

A word was missing.

The important one.

The "Not" part of "Not Pregnant."

Matt inched open the door, saying quietly, "Well?"

"How…reliable are these?"

"Pretty reliable," he said. "I didn't want to buy the cheap ones in case they aren’t—Anyway, what did it say?"

Swallowing, she turned the test so that the window was facing him.

"Fuck," he said.

Julie nodded, turning the test back around and looking at it.

Pregnant. She was pregnant.

The door shut and Matt was gone again, but Julie didn't notice. Her brain was vaguely foggy as she stared in numb disbelief at the little window, waiting for it to change or add, "just kidding!" to the result.

She couldn't be pregnant.

Unplanned pregnancy was one of those things that happened to other people.

She couldn't be pregnant. She just couldn't.