Tully reaches out and steadies me. “What is it?” she questions alarmed.
I nod my head in his direction and Tully twists around to get a good look at my past, but what’s worse is Kaylah trailing behind him with her boyfriend, Jesse Ryder, the king of Broken Hill High.
“Oooooh,” she says, drawing it out. “Are you good? Do you want to leave?”
“No,” I shake my head. “I need to forget,” I tell her, knowing I don’t need much more explanation than that, after all, she’s been the only person I’ve been able to vent to since it happened all those months ago. She knows just how hurt I was when Jackson left and she understands the torment I felt when Kaylah left right along with him.
I was all alone for months and seeing them here right now reminds me of everything I felt and everything I’ve been missing. I loved them both like family and that was torn away in the blink of an eye. I made one stupid mistake and it cost me dearly.
“Well then,” Tully grins, waving her hand around the room to showcase the selection of man meat in the room. “Take your pick.”
I look them over, not getting that turned on vibe from anyone. “I don’t know,” I tell her. “Who have you been with? Who’s good?”
“Geez, we’re not picking out used cars.”
“Aren’t we?”
“You sound like such a whore,” she laughs as she looks over our selection. “Honestly,” she says with a cringe. “Spencer is the only one worth getting your junk off for. He’s a shitty boyfriend, but the guy certainly knows his way around a vag, and fuck…his tongue. He knows how to use that too.”
“You sure?” I question, looking her over. “You won’t get weird if I hook up with him?”
“No,” she laughs, “Because I know you won’t go far. You might suck his dick, but you won’t let him inside the promised land. It’s not your style.”
“How do you know what my style is?” I ask, looking up and double checking that I haven’t been spotted by Kaylah or Jackson as I’m not quite sure I have what it takes to handle that right about now.
“I just do,” she tells me. “Now, fuck off and go get your knickers wet.”
Well, when she puts it like that…
I put on my best man-eating smile and try to get Noah off my mind which is easier said than done. I get my target in sight and beeline straight for him, despite the fact that he’s currently dancing with Candice, who’s grinding her ass back into him.
I catch his eye and as if every star in the universe was perfectly aligned, he drops his hands from her waist and steps around her like yesterday’s trash.
Candice shrieks her outrage, but she’s quickly forgotten as Spencer scoops me up in his capable arms. I mean, they’re warm and inviting, but I certainly don’t get the same thrill as when… shit. No. No more thinking about him.
I bring my bottle of green yumminess to my lips and take another shot. “Whoa,” Spencer chuckles in my ear as his fingers splay against the exposed skin of my stomach. “Slow down, babe. We’ve got all night.”
“Trust me,” I tell him, pushing my ass back into him. “I’m hoping to be well and truly passed out before ‘all night’ happens.”
“Now that I can get down with.”
With that, I tune out Spencer’s mindless babble and try my best to get lost in the music. I bring the bottle to my lips once again and realize that maybe I do want Jackson to see me. I want him to know what he skipped out on, but then, apparently, he’s with that other girl now. What would he care anyway? I’m just some chick who got tossed aside like the many other girls he’s been with. I don’t know why I thought I’d be special.
Spencer’s fingers tighten on my waist. “Come on,” he says. “I need some air.”
I let him lead me out the back door and by this stage, I’ve had enough to drink that I don’t really care what we do right now.
Spencer pulls a packet of cigarettes from his pocket and holds them out towards me. “Want one?”
“Oh, no. I don’t….” I cut myself off. What have I got to lose? “You know what? Yeah, ok.”
I slide a cigarette out of the packet and try not to focus on Spencer’s curious eyes. “You sure? Have you smoked before?”
“Nope, but it couldn’t be that hard, right?”
“Depends,” he laughs before pulling out a lighter. “Here.”
I place the cigarette between my lips and lean into the lighter. As the flame stands tall, I suck in a breath and hope to God I’m doing it right, otherwise, I’m about to make a fool of myself.
Once the cigarette is lit, Spencer lights his own before blowing out a cloud of smoke and making me wonder why the hell that didn’t happen for me.