‘I understand it. I even lived it for a time, particularly when Jag was studying in the US. Unfortunately, I didn’t live up to my father’s expectations as a suitable fill-in.’
She blinked at his harsh tone. ‘How could you not?’
Rafe’s jaw hardened. ‘I wasn’t Jag.’
A slight frown marred her forehead, her eyes fixed on his as if she saw more than he had intended her to see. ‘But that’s—’
‘Irrelevant.’ He cut off her sympathetic response. He never talked about the past. Not even with his siblings. ‘If the people of Santara should ever need me I would be there for them, but this isn’t about me. This is about you needing to find balance.’ He perched on the edge of the desk, his fingers itching to push back the strand of hair that curved over her cheek. ‘I told you before that you need to say no more often.’
‘I’m not good at no.’ She gave him a brief look. ‘I suppose that makes me the dutiful little mouse in your eyes but—’
‘I should never have said that,’ Rafe interjected. ‘You’re dedicated and focused and that will make you a great queen, but you should stand up for yourself more.’
‘Well, thanks. For the compliment.’ She huffed out a breath. ‘As to the rest... I do try to say no, but there’s so much to learn. And it’s so easy to make a mistake.’
‘Mistakes are how we learn.’
‘They’re not how I want to learn.’ She shook her head. ‘They cost too much.’
Rafe frowned at the vehemence in her voice. ‘You’re speaking from experience.’ And not a good one, he guessed.
‘Yes, but we all make mistakes, don’t we?’ she replied defensively. ‘Even you.’
‘I don’t deny it. Most of mine get splashed across the Internet. But I doubt you’ve ever made a mistake worth talking about.’
She narrowed her eyes and took the bait as he hoped she would. ‘I told you the other morning that I’m not as straight as you think I am. I nearly caused a scandal once.’
Rafe raised an eyebrow. ‘I doubt that.’
‘You think me so boring?’
‘I don’t think you’re boring at all.’ He thought she was the most beguiling woman he’d ever met and, to his surprise, he wanted to know her secrets. Especially this one. ‘Tell me about your scandal.’
Her lips twisted distastefully and for a moment he thought she’d tell him to mind his own business again.
‘I was seventeen and naive.’ She arched a brow as if daring him to mock her. ‘He was Italian with nice arms and he worked in the stables.’
‘Ah, I think I see where this is going,’ he said, hoping he was wrong. ‘Pray, continue.’
‘It’s not that ground-breaking, actually... He told me that he loved me and took me to bed. Then he went straight to my father and used my virginity as a bargaining chip so we’d be forced to get married.’
She was right; the story wasn’t ground-breaking, just totally humiliating for the one who had been used so callously.
Knowing how bad it felt to be judged out of hand, he kept his tone as light as hers. ‘I take it that your father didn’t exactly jump for joy at the information and welcome him into the household with open arms.’
Alexa gave him a wry grin. ‘I still don’t know how much he paid Stefano to leave and never contact me again, but sometimes, when I’m feeling particularly low, I like to imagine that he put the country into debt because of it.’
Rafe laughed at her dryness, but it didn’t stop him from wanting to shove this Stefano’s teeth down his throat and bury him beneath the blazing sun with just his head showing, as his ancestors would have done.
‘If you give me his full name I could find him and have the Chase brothers beat the cretin to a pulp.’
Unless he got to him first, of course.
‘You’d do that for me?’ She blinked at him in surprise, as if no one had suggested it before. ‘Not even my father sai
d that, and you’re the ultimate heartbreaker. You leave women crying all the time.’
‘That is not true,’ he said curtly, for the first time wishing that his playboy reputation didn’t exist. ‘I only enter relationships with women who know that I won’t fall in love with them, and I’m upfront and honest about that from the beginning. If they cry when it ends it’s not because I duped them.’