Reminders of Him

The second time is much longer, and somehow even better.

CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO

LEDGER

The kitten slept in Kenna’s arms all night. Maybe it’s weird, but I like watching her with Ivy. She’s affectionate with her. She always makes sure Ivy doesn’t have an opportunity to run outside when she isn’t looking.

It makes me curious how she’ll be with Diem. Because I’m confident I’ll get to witness it someday. It might take us a while to get there, but I’ll find a way. She deserves it and Diem deserves it, and I trust my gut feelings more than my doubts.

I move quietly as I reach for my phone to check the time. It’s almost seven in the morning, and Diem will wake up soon. She’ll notice my truck is gone. I should probably try to get home before they leave for Patrick’s mother’s house. I don’t want to slip out while Kenna is asleep, though. I would feel like an asshole if she woke up alone after last night.

I press a gentle kiss to the corner of her mouth, and then I brush her hair out of her face. She begins to move, and moan, and I know she’s just waking up, but her wake-up sounds are very similar to her sex sounds, and now I don’t want to leave. Ever.

She finally gets her eyes open and looks up at me.

“I have to go,” I say quietly. “Can I come back over later?”

She nods. “I’ll be here. I’m off today.” She gives me a closed-lips kiss. “I’ll kiss you better later, but I want to brush my teeth first.”

I laugh and then kiss her cheek. Before I get up, we have this brief moment of eye contact where it feels like she’s thinking something she doesn’t want to say out loud. I stare down at her for a minute, waiting for her to speak, but when she doesn’t, I kiss her on the mouth one more time. “I’ll be back this afternoon.”

I waited too long. Diem and Grace are already awake and in their front yard when I pull onto our street. Diem sees me before Grace does, so she’s already running across the street when I pull into my driveway and kill my truck.

I swing open the door and immediately scoop her up. I kiss the side of Diem’s head right when she wraps herself around me and squeezes my neck. I swear to God, there is nothing even remotely close to a hug from this girl.

A hug from her mother does run a very close second, though.

Grace makes it to my yard a few seconds later. She shoots me a teasing look, as if she knows why I was out all night. She might think she knows, but she wouldn’t be looking at me like this if she had any clue who I was with.

“You look like you didn’t get much sleep,” she says.

“I slept plenty. Get your head out of the gutter.”

Grace laughs and tugs on Diem’s ponytail. “Well, you have perfect timing. She was hoping to say goodbye before we left.”

Diem hugs my neck again. “Don’t forget about me,” she says, loosening her grip so I can set her back down.

“You’ll only be gone one night, D. How could I forget about you?”

Diem scratches her face and says, “You’re old, and old people forget stuff.”

“I am not old,” I say. “Hold on before you go, Grace.” I unlock my front door and head to my kitchen and grab the flowers I bought for her yesterday morning. I haven’t let a Mother’s Day or a Father’s Day pass without getting something for her or Patrick.

She’s been like a mother to me my whole life, so I’d honestly probably still buy her flowers even if Scotty were here.

“Happy Mother’s Day.” I hand them to her, and she acts surprised and delighted and gives me a hug, but I don’t hear her thank-you through the loud regret piercing through me right now.

I forgot today was Mother’s Day. I woke up next to Kenna this morning and said nothing to her about it. I feel like an asshole.

“I need to put these in water before I go,” Grace says. “Want to buckle Diem into the car for me?”

I grab Diem’s hand and walk them across the street. Patrick is already in the car waiting. Grace walks the flowers into the house, and I open the back door to buckle Diem into her car seat. “What’s Mother’s Day?” she asks me.

“It’s a holiday.” I keep my explanation brief, but Patrick and I trade glances.

“I know. But why are you and NoNo giving Nana flowers for Mother’s Day? You said Robin is your mother.”

“Robin is my mother,” I say. “And your grandma Landry is NoNo’s mother. That’s why you’re going to see her today. But on Mother’s Day, if you know a mother that you love, you buy her flowers even if she isn’t your mother.”