And that round went to Prince Asshole.

“You took my breath away,” Kevin continued, oblivious to the drama from above. “When you removed your warrior’s helmet, I wondered if the gods had chosen to honor me this day for any world where you exist must truly be a blessing.”

Gary stared at him. “Tiggy,” he said, crooking his lips toward the half-giant. “Who is he talking to?”

“You,” Tiggy said. “He wants to eat Gary flower.”

“My flower was eaten a long time ago.” He looked the dragon up and down and said, “I’ll see where this goes. Continue.”

“First, might I know your name?” Kevin asked. “I assume it is something so magical that the very utterance of it would cause rainbows to weep in glorious joy.”

“Gary.”

“Gary,” the dragon whispered in awe, the name on his lips sounding almost like benediction. “Have two syllables ever sounded more beautiful together? Geh. Ree. The gods must have outdone themselves the day that word was born. They took the exquisiteness from the earth and rolled it together with a pinch of sunshine and love and gorgeousness and when it was finished, it was Gary.”

“Wow,” Gary said. “That was… words.”

“This is getting uncomfortable,” I told Justin.

“I might have gotten lucky that Gary showed up,” he said.

“So,” Ryan said, his sword now dragging in the dirt. He looked slightly put out. “Are we, like, gonna fight here? I’m not really sure of the protocol for something like this and—”

“Ryan,” Gary said. “Shut up. I’m being wooed.”

“But—”

“Ryan. Shut. It.”

“Gods,” Ryan grumbled.

“I apologize for the Knight Commander,” Gary said to Kevin. “He doesn’t understand how love works.”

“That’s bullshit,” Ryan said. “I know l

ove. I’ve got so much love. You don’t even know.”

“He does?” I asked, heart beating traitorously in my chest.

“You do?” Justin asked.

“Hi, Sam!” Tiggy said, waving at me.

“Should I take him out for you, my sweet?” Kevin asked. “All you have to do is but ask and I will make sure his blood is spilled upon the ground. I’ll roast his skin with my fire. I’ll tear off his head. I stick my claws up his perky ass if his screams will make you happy.”

“Whoa,” Ryan said. “And thank you. It is rather perky.”

“Hmmm,” Gary said.

“Gary,” Ryan said. “Buddy.”

“Hmmm.”

“Gary. You said we were friends! You said you liked me.”

“I say that about a lot of things. Like people. And ham.”

“Are you going to stop him?” Justin whispered to me.

Tags: T.J. Klune Tales From Verania Fantasy
Source: readsnovelonline.net