“What was your plan, then?” Leslie asked, stretching her claws out in the snow. “If you weren’t there to hurt him, how were you planning on saving your Prince? Especially since a dragon’s hoard is the most precious thing to them. All else pales in comparison.”
I blinked. “Um. I don’t… know if we really had a plan.”
“What,” Pat said, no inflection whatsoever. It was terribly impressive.
I shrugged awkwardly. “I guess we were just going to kind of show up and wing it?”
“Wing it,” Pat repeated.
“Ooh,” Leslie said. “I like this human. Winging it plans are my favorite kind of plans.”
“Look,” I said. “You don’t know me. And that’s okay. I know I don’t look like much. I know I’m only an apprentice. Sure, I can talk to you and help others do the same, but really, in the end, that’s not all that impressive. I’m young, and Randall would tell you that I’m unpracticed and uncoordinated. Maybe even dangerous. I’m told I have more magic in me than anything else in the known world, and if I’m not careful, it can be used against me. There is a man who betrayed the two wizards I admire most who wants to eat part of my soul. I’m scared sometimes. Other times I’m angry. Because this shouldn’t be happening to me. This is too much for one person to carry on their own. I hate the gods sometimes for putting this all on me.”
The dragons were silent. Watching, waiting.
“But that’s just it,” I said quietly. “The gods may have chosen me. They may be testing me. They may be using me. To what end, I don’t know. Maybe I’m needed to course-correct the way of things. Maybe Myrin is an aberration. Or maybe I am. Maybe I’m not meant to win, maybe I’m being lied to for reasons hidden in shadow. In the end, though, I am not alone. I have Gary and Tiggy. I have Morgan and Randall. I have my parents and the King and Justin. I have my cornerstone.”
“And Kevin,” Pat said.
“And Kevin,” I agreed. “He may aggravate me. His relationship with Gary is probably an affront to the gods. Sometimes I want to punch him in the eye when he asks me if I need help with my homework, and also with a blow job. I mean, what the fuck, Kevin? Why are you like that? But he’s my friend. Ever since that day we showed up at his keep to do… something, he’s been my friend.
“Look, I’m not perfect. I make mistakes. I’m loud and obnoxious and I try really hard to make sure everyone likes me. Probably more than I should. But I didn’t have to do that with them. Even though it might have taken me a long time to see it, eventually I did. They like me for me.”
I rubbed the back of my neck, suddenly embarrassed at the impromptu speech I was giving. “But you have to know that not everyone feels that way. There are people in Verania who hate me. Because of my position with the Crown. Because of the color of my skin. Because I dared to look upon the stars and wish for something more. I don’t know if they’re jealous or if they genuinely look at me and see someone to despise. I don’t know that it matters. Well, I don’t know that most of it matters. Lady Tina DeSilva is another story. One day, and one day soon, I will stand before her and have my revenge. She will plead for mercy, and I will deny her request and say unto her, ‘Behold, you cankerous bitch! I stand before you as your ending!’”
I began to cackle evilly.
That lasted only a few seconds, because it sounded as if a small chicken was being strangled.
I made a mental note to work on my evil laugh.
I coughed. “Um. Where was I? Uh… oh! Friendship. Right, friendship is super important to me and I love them and they love me and that’s why I didn’t slay Kevin. The end.”
I bowed, expecting thunderous applause.
There was none.
I might not have stuck that landing as much as I thought I had.
I looked back up at them.
The dragons stared down at me.
“The end?” I said again, trying not to make it sound like a question but failing miserably.
“What was it talking about?” Leslie whispered to Pat.
“I don’t rightly know,” Pat said. “It certainly was loud.”
I threw my hands up. “Oh, come on! That was passionate.”
“Is that another word for loud?” Leslie asked. “Because if it is, it was so passionate. You might just be the most passionate thing I have ever met.”
“Dragons are such assholes,” I muttered. “What the fuck.”
“Step forward, child,” Pat said.
“I’m not a chi—you know what? Doesn’t even matter.” I took a step forward. “Please don’t murder my face.”