“Wait,” Otter says. His voice sounds rough, like he’s having trouble speaking. “What?”
“How do you know my name?” I ask the girl, gripping the door tightly.
She fidgets on the porch. Looks away. Back at me, then away again. She opens her mouth, then closes it. She sniffs and grips the strap to her backpack even tighter. “Ty said if I ever needed help, I could find him here.”
“He’s on a trip,” I say dumbly. “He’ll be back this afternoon.”
“You’re shorter than I thought you’d be,” she says as if it’s nothing. “How disappointing to know that’s what I’ve got ahead of me.” She takes a deep breath. It comes out shaky.
“I don’t…,” Otter says, and he sounds so unsure that I want to go to him, but I can’t seem to make my feet move. “What do you mean hidden behind the other one?”
It hits me then. This little girl. Even though I probably knew as soon as I opened the door and saw her eyes that looked so much like my brother’s, so much like my own, so much like hers, it still takes me by surprise, and it’s like the Kid and I are standing in the kitchen picking ourselves back up again. That’s what we do. We get knocked down, we spit the blood out onto the ground, and we push ourselves back up. That’s what we’ve always done. That’s who we are.
She’s lost, Bear. And I don’t think she’s ever going to be found. Nothing’s changed. But….
What?
I met Izzie.
“Izzie?” I whisper.
Bear, she’s… amazing. She’s like me. Smarter, even. I don’t know if I have words to even describe her. No, I take that back. She’s like us. She’s you and me.
We can’t….
She nods. “Ty said to find him if I needed help.” She sniffs again, and I can tell she’s trying to keep it together. But it’s a losing battle. “And I need help.”
I know. There’s nothing… bad happening. I don’t think. She wasn’t bruised. But Julie was never like that.
There’s more than one type of abuse.
“Are you sure?” Otter says from behind me. “How could they never see that…? I don’t—there’s two… oh fuck.”
“What happened?” I manage to ask.
I told her the same thing. Julie.
Will she listen?
&n
bsp; I don’t know. Bear, we can’t forget about her.
But I did, didn’t I? To an extent. Out of sight, out of mind, and I have a life, I am building a life with my husband. We are having a child, and things are finally going our way. We are happy, we are healthy, we are whole, and I haven’t had time for things that I’ve pushed away in an attempt to keep my sanity.
There’s not much more we can do, Ty.
And maybe that had been a lie.
Julie would never let us see her.
She said as much. But there has to be some way, right?
We can ask Erica Sharp, but I don’t know how many rights siblings have when the parent is still involved. Even one with a history like Julie McKenna.
I’d left a message for Erica Sharp. She’d called back a day or so later. It’d gone to voicemail. I’d gotten distracted with life after that.
And I didn’t call her back.